I am soooo agitated and on edge. I warn all to steer clear. I had to stand and listen to my dad yell at me for losing the phone. I didn't lose the phone and it comes with a page button. So instead of wasting time and energy just press the stupid button. Then my mom keeps asking me questions to which she already knows the answers to. I despise when people do that. After listening to my parents joke and be jolly with the other siblings that come for Sunday dinner and then having to see the different relationship we have made my mood an even darker shade of consuming blackness. Then because I am sooo smart I lash out verbally, to both of my parents. I just want to scream and rage and break things. I think this might have to do with the fact that I was recently diagnosed with bipolar disorder and have yet to tell my parents. I don't want to tell them, that will just let them closer to me and I have no reason to believe it will be any different then before. I don't know what to think and I am not sure what I am feeling...I am just very very angry and wound tight like a spring, willing to be released. My parents always make things worse.