Guilty over not going to church

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by sadhart, Jan 29, 2012.

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  1. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    So all this month I have not gone to church. This has been a frustrating month and I have felt discouraged and tired all month. I guess because of my discouraged feelings towards God, that I have been afraid to go out there. I did go to bible study last week, but even that was awkward.
  2. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    I have had times like this, am having one now actually.
    I don't know what the answer is, but my parish priest once told me "In times of doubt and loss of faith, follow your religion as you would if your faith was strong."
    Basically going thru the motions can help get you over the faithless times.
    It works for me......sometimes.
  3. Wastingecho

    Wastingecho Well-Known Member

    was raised roman catholic with all the inherent contradictions that carries

    after a time it became too much for me - haven't been to church except for weddings and funerals

    in the end i decided that any relationship i had with god had to be personal - uncluttered by the politics and ceremony

    god is everywhere, compassionate, and understanding - you don't need to be in church to talk to god
  4. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    Yeah, well I tried that and I don't feel comfortable going to church or anywhere for that matter when I don't feel like it. Right now, I am angry at God because this makes no sense; one minute I feel like he's there, then suddenly I was wrong. I just wish I had the courage to turn my back on God and church altogether.
  5. Wow when I saw this post, I felt like I coudl have written this... Ive been struggling with this for such a long time....
    I just dont feel "worthy" or like I can go to church at all :\
    I understand how you feel...its hard :(
    I dont know if I have any advice really...eventually it may go away, or you could talk to you (pastor/or church leader) about it. I feel the same about God, sometimes I feel like ...he understands me and hes there....and sometimes I just..I feel like I just want to be alone, like theres no *bright side* ..I just want to sit in my pain and not have to be accountable to anybody or try to put a happy face.
    When I go o church it feels like I HAVE to put on this happy face and be "happy" or else im not good or blah blah blah

    I understand this a lot, I dont have much advice, but ....You are not alone <3
  6. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    Thanks for being understanding...that is sometimes more important than advice. By the way, welcome to the forums.
  7. lifeless84

    lifeless84 Well-Known Member

    Heh, like I was reading about myself. I too feel inner guilt when I do not go to church, but what worse, even greater guilt I feel when I go, because I do not know if I still belive in God (guess, rather not) and that makes me feel hypocritical/false. I too wish I had the courage to turn my back on God and church altogether. Recently, I even started asking myself, not if I belive, but if I want it to be true. The word "eternity' became for me the synonim of the thing I most fear
  8. letty

    letty Banned Member

    I feel guilty alot about not going to church, I use to work in the church office, and I even was a missionary at one time. I think God understands, its the people that can be hard to deal with.
  9. sihuskyzoi

    sihuskyzoi Well-Known Member

    It's like you read my mind. I grew up the daughter of a Baptist minister... and thus was raised in the church. I haven't been consistently in years. When I go on special occasions, like Christmas, weddings, funerals, etc., I feel uncomfortable.. goosebumpy even. Some of the most judgmental and negative people I've ever met, I've met at church. The first place I ever felt "not good enough" was in church. If there is a God... I'm not sure he's at church. Yet because of my upbringing, I still feel guilt in not going. And I still wonder if my life is falling apart because if he does exist, then he is angry at me.
  10. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    Someone I know from church called me today letting me know people were thinking about me. I appreciated it, though I'm not sure when I will be going back.
  11. TLA

    TLA Antiquitie's Friend

    I feel half-guilty. I love to praise God for keeping me safe while I drive or walk around town, or for keeping my car running and money in my pocket. I sing praises easier than I pray.
    I feel God is everywhere, although the Bible says we are to unite with other believers; Many of us, don't like uniting with hypocrites or judemental, rude folks. I am not looking forward to worshiping with people that ignore you or pass you by with no glace or welcome...seems that does not make you want to be there, especially if you are battling depression or chemical imbalace.

    I just have not found the place I want to be at. Maybe that is true for have to for Gods will for your life, not anyone elses. I do visit a church when I visit my brother in another town and I feel comfortable and accepted there. That is only once a month. You have to find the right place for you. Know what I mean?
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 29, 2012
  12. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    Yeah, I understand what you're saying for the most part. The church i sort of go to, is good...and they are very open and understanding. I guess one of the main reasons why I haven't gone out there is because of crap with my family has been emotionally draining. Other than that, I guess my anxiety has been holding me back from going out there to church.
  13. i stopped going to church and ive never been happier-you feel guilty and thats not healthy-taking care of yourself is not selfish-at this point its the only "job" u have-dont love god-love yourself-its healthy-trust me.
  14. eagles_fan

    eagles_fan Well-Known Member

    I personally don't think you should feel any guilt. I'm an atheist though, so perhaps you wouldn't find my opinion on the matter worth anything? That said, I think Christians just put guilt into you to make you worship God more. It's a sham, but I don't dislike most Christians. If you feel like you should have a relationship with your God, then by all means, relate with Him, but without the guilt. :]
  15. Athnys

    Athnys Well-Known Member

    I go to church every week and on holy days... it saddens me that there's no one my age there to relate with. Everyone's either older than me or much younger. All the kids I grew up with in my parish have left to go to college elsewhere.

    What's worse for me is that a lot of people hate my religion and think that it's hypocritical and that the priests tell people to hate women and homosexuals, and that's really not true, but no one my age will hear it because no one my age wants to hear it, so to them I'm just a fool.

    I deal with people who reject moral absolutes and tell me presumptuous things like "I believe in God but I don't think he cares what I do as long as I don't rape or murder," or "God doesn't really want people going to church all the time, he understands us" and then if I disagree then I'm arrogant. It's really not fair.
  16. Daphna

    Daphna Well-Known Member

    Hello friend! Another believer how nice! I would suggest staying home and reading your bible one on one with our creator. Front to back. Its not a quick read, but its rewarding.
  17. Daphna

    Daphna Well-Known Member

    After I did this. I was closer to our creator because I am able to understand him and his whole creation this a way. Praise YHWH!
  18. Daphna

    Daphna Well-Known Member

    Church will always be there, and how better it will be when you are aware of the truth inside the book/ savior everyone believes in! Because our Messiah is the word made into flesh after all.
  19. Athnys

    Athnys Well-Known Member

    Well there's much, much more to being Christian than reading the Bible, but I can't skip going to church or it will count against me. I was getting into the routine of praying the Divine Office, but with every day being unpredictable and my only access to the Breviary being through the Internet, I often missed many of the Hours.
  20. Daphna

    Daphna Well-Known Member

    I wouldn't feel guilty for not going to church. Our creator doesn't need you to go to a place and pay money to get to know him. He says to ASK, SEEK, KNOCK. He wants us to know and understand him. I didn't learn a thing in church, but now I could go to any church and know my creator without someone having to tell me about him because I learned about him through his word on my own. HalleluYah!
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