guilty

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by painfulmuse, Jul 25, 2013.

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  1. painfulmuse

    painfulmuse Member

    im feeling very low, guilty and sorry for myself, last night i self harmed , it helped at the time but now im feeling even more guilty for doing it after soo long, i thought it would be the less of two evils but maybe i was wrong!.... i switched and lost it with myself, left the house in the middle of the night in the pour rain and thunder storm to try to discract myself but only got worse, i was pick but by police and taken to hospital for treatment, but it hasnt helped i want to do more and im finding it very hard to fight the urges to self harm or worse
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I am sorry hun you are in such a bad place Can you call someone go to a friends house or relatives hun so you are not alone. If you have to you call crisis line ok and go back to hospital hugs
     
  3. Mayflower7

    Mayflower7 Banned Member

    Hi Painfulmuse,
    I am so sorry, please don't hurt yourself. I am glad you got hospital treatment, disappointed they didn't offer you more help. Please seek professional help, see your GP or mental health team.
    Distract yourself when you feel any urges, don't be alone right now can you stay with family or friends?
    You can stop doing this and move on with your life.
    Take care
    Kate
     
  4. painfulmuse

    painfulmuse Member

    my GP isnt mush help atm, and im not talking to my family and im not intending to start any time soon, i dont want to bother my friends as they have enough to deal with on their own they do not need me messing up their lifes as well as my own, now ive started to cut i just cant stop, its like my body is being control by something else, i cant control my hands, im shaking all the time and keep on breaking down in tears, im really scared that i will lose it completely and will not be able to stop myself doing more then just self harming
     
  5. meaningless-vessel

    meaningless-vessel Well-Known Member

    Not reaching out for help and support through friends/family/GP suggests that you'd rather face this alone. Unfortunately, that's probably one of the worst choices in this situation - to try going at it alone. Feeling scared that you will lose it completely only adds to the better nature of seeking some more localised support if possible.

    You say your GP isn't much help, have you been able to explain openly and honestly everything that you think/feel? If not, that could be a possible reason behind not getting the help you'd need properly. And, if that's not the case, you could always try querying for a second opinion.
     
  6. Pertokeyo

    Pertokeyo Banned Member

    Self Harming hurts both physically and emotionally.

    Yes there are suggestions and testimonies that say that self harm can stop negative feelings quickly, but this is a only a short term solution to a long term problem. You're too awesome to be stuck in a long term cycle of negativity, so focus all your attention on the steps you can take to address this long term problem. Don't be afraid to ask for help from professionals and/or family members. Medical practitioners may be able to treat any biological issues, and your family/friends can provide emotional comfort. The most important thing is to realise that you deserve to beat your long term issues, and you will.
     
  7. Mayflower7

    Mayflower7 Banned Member

    Hi Painfulmuse,
    I am sorry this is happening, friends often want to help but I totally understand. Talk to others on here, please see your GP or try a different GP if possible at the practice. You really do need medical help to help you with your anxiety/depression/ stressful encounters. Therapy works for many if you can access from existing services or can fund yourself if possible.
    Try and distract yourself when the feelings of self-harm come on you can beat this with help. You have support on here, which will really help.
    Medication works for many, just can take time to be effective.
    I hope you are feeling much better very soon.
    Take care
    Kate
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 28, 2013
  8. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    You know what they say, when you fall off the horse..you get straight back on and that applies here. Don't feel guilty you are only human. Best of luck to you and I'm around if you need to talk :hug:
     
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