Discussion in 'Welcome' started by Othello, May 21, 2007.

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  1. Othello

    Othello New Member

    H-e-l-l-o(as the title says), I am Othello. No, that isn't my real name. lmfao. It is a boy's name though, which is weird, but... ah... actually, my name is Haruhi - but let's just say Othello, but as soon as I turned eighteen, I'm allowed to change my name to anything I want, because Haruhi... isn't the best name in the world. And... yeah. I haven't been Othello that long, but that is just where it's ended up over the past six months.

    So, here I am. I am Othello now.
    Because I can only have one name for every little while.

    Anyway, maybe I should move onto the knick of everything. Let's start over - Hi, I'm Othello, I'm fifteen years-old and I suffer from ultra-violent (Is that Clockwork orange? No... that's Ultra-Violence) Panic Attacks, because, for some reason, I'm prone to going Insane. I'm an ex-delinquent from Elementary School where I used to be a member of a Gang, and I feel really guilty about it, even though I can't remember any of it.

    My last fight gave my a scar on my eyelid, resulting in a disfigurement in my eyelashes, so I have one white eyelash - which looks really bazaar in bright lights.

    Yeah, o'course, I'm suicidal - not as much as some people, though during an Attack, I go insane. No, I don't have a boring life - I'm the Vice-President of the Student Council, a member of the Community Soccer Pitch, a journalist (I have been published three times), a poet, I'm working on a book that surrounds my heritage-ish thing (Japanese), I'm a School Newspaper Advisor/Writer, I'm a member of the Local Campus Life (Even though I'm not Christian), I'm busy with homework a lot, I go on a lot of trips (Friday - Camping. June - Washington DC. August - The Grand Canyon). Oh, yeah, and I'm loved by my entire family down to the very knick of my striped tights.

    I'm known as; "That One Punk-Outfit girl." And I'm oogled on the street because of my strange sense of fashion and over-ly hyper mannerisms. I'm hyper, chaotic, and I have often been called perverted - but that isn't unnatural to see in teens these days, is it? I like to dress in clothes that make me stand out - tanktops over long-sleeved uniforms, skirts as short as... well, let's leave that out (No, It's NOT that short), and tights that make me look like a zebra. But that is just me.

    I'm VERY superstitious, and I believe strongly in Good Luck and Bad Luck. I wear a pendant around me neck 24/7 (when sleeping, it's under my pillow), if my Chinese Zodiac - the Monkey... which is actually 1992. Wait... okay, I'll be fifteen next month. Not fifteen yet. Fourteen. *doesn't pay attention to age.* Oh, and I have no sense of Gender - if anyone knows what that means. I don't believe that anyone has a gender... yea, yea, you got parts, but it's not that that comes through. Maybe people inherit diseases from people and develop weird -- ANYWAY, yeah -- I don't believe in anything that has anything to do with Gender, Race, Colour, Looks, or anything of the sort.

    I'm going to come out and say it - I cut myself.

    Yes, I do. But not all the time. At night, I go insane, and I can't help it. I'll just do it to wake up.

    I have an MPD disorder, it is very soft, but still it worries people. (MPD = Multi Personality Disorder) I'll loose my memory sometimes do to it, and my personalities don't stay in focus, but I'm the main personality (actually, I'm the real person... not a personality.)

    I'm Shy (only in school) & I have a fear of teachers.
    I'm very bold, though, for some reason. And speak whatever.
    If I'm angry, people are afraid of me.
    My school knows about my pasts, and remembers my delinquent nicknames.
    I like Polish food (Wait... what does that have to do with personality?)
    And I hate who I am.

    Okay, anyway, this is becoming a very long post. So I might as well wrap it up. So - the reason I'm here? You may be thinking that... like - what the heck?

    As I've said, yea, I'm suicidal. Not that much. I have a few problems. I'm a fantastic actress, and I can act through anything, which was the reason I tricked myself out of Therapy, because I prodded around it, until the lady believe I was fine, and I really only cut myself once because of my mother's horrible relationship with her boyfriend (she and he get bad comments all the time, because she is White and he is African American, and they have a son). Actually, she had nothing to do with it. I seem shy and all that stuff on the outside - actually, I'm really screwed up. I know that. But people always say; Oh, it's just teen depression. You'll get over it once you turned a certain age. And me? I don't really think so. Heck, maybe it's true. But I've been like this since I was five. I've been betrayed by so many people, which lead me to severe anger in elementary school. A teacher helped me stop when I was in fourth-fifth grade, and I loved her like a third mother (My mom, and the my awesome step-mom.)

    You know what else is great?
    No one wants me to live with them.
    My Uncle, My Dad & his wife - My mom got stuck with it.
    And I'm sure she hates me for it. I mean, she loves me.
    A parent must love, right?
    But, heck... I must have ruined everything when I was born.
    She was only fifteen.
    And, you know what else?
    All the time I hear teachers going; "I won't miss THAT at all."
    And they look at me.
    Hey -- I guess life is full of pretty cuts and straight cuts.
    I seem to be falling short on both.

    Well, that's me, Othello.
    Sorry this was so long - it was probably boring. But, oh well, my fingers don't want to stop. I hope this place will keep me going anyway - I have a few friends online that help me to keep going to, my Internet-sister, Mi, and a lot of people around the Wire. So, I hope I can have some friends here, too.

    Thanks for reading my ramblings,
    ps;; oh, yeah - if anyone wants to be my friend... like... yeah, whatever. But, if anyone does... just... I dunno, private message me. ah.... that was a waste of space... I'll probably give ya' my YIM, because I hate talking on my emails and crud. So, yup. [lmfao. I was afraid to post this at first. I've been sitting here for like ten minutes trying to make sure I didn't sound like a lunatic and scare people away. XD So, I'm just going to post it and say "what the heck"... don't hurt me, or anything. (lol)]
  2. Insignificant

    Insignificant Account Closed

    :welcome: to the forum. there are alot of young people around here and i'm sure you'll make alot of friends. this is a good supportive place to be.

    my daughter is going to be 15 next month as well. that's cool

    please take care and we'll see ya around the forum.
  3. hammockmonkey

    hammockmonkey Well-Known Member

    nice to meet you Othello. (By the way that is one of my favorite plays of all time.)
  4. Nima

    Nima Well-Known Member

    Welcome Othello
  5. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Hi and :welcome: toSF. I am sure you will meet plenty of new people here. You sound as if you are a very busy person. Take care. :hug:
  6. ~CazzaAngel~

    ~CazzaAngel~ Staff Alumni

    Welcome to the forum. :hug:
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