I went to my rheumatologist today, and I did manage to get her to acknowledge that I could have an autoimmune disorder but it was pretty pointless. She said she would not prescribe me anything more than plaquenil, which I'm already taking, and it's pretty good medication, but it's just not enough. She needs more evidence before I could get medication like Imuran or Prednisone, so she brought up pleurisy, and I'm like I have a CT report with me that shows I had scarring on my lungs, and she's like well that could of been from pneumonia or an infection, which I have never had, the 6 months of lung pain last year didn't matter either, and I ended up with symptoms of pleurisy. Doesn't MATTER. She's like you'd have to be seeing a lung specialist and be under care for that for me to do anything. This is the toughest doctor I have ever had to deal with. And I am sure you all don't want to here all this, I'm sorry. But I need to vent. She said you have to outweigh the risks from the benefits with those medications, and talked like it would be too harmful. I told her how I felt, didn't help anything. I ended up telling her that she was actually causing me more harm than good by not helping me, I started crying extremelyyyyyyy bad, got up and left. I don't think I made a very good choice by doing that but I couldn't take it. She offered to send me to a specialist center out of state just a few hours away but I was just really hoping she would help me. It took me hours to quit crying, and some alcohol which I am currently enjoying. I went to my GP and tried to get a prescription for ambien which I called in awhile back and never picked up, but he never prescribed it, good thing I guess, cause the mood I was in, I would have probably taken them all. But I still need something to help me sleep, still need something to help this pain. I am going crazy here and don't see any way out.