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Hanging on .........

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#1
I'm new here although I have looked at some of the forums before. I started to register a few times but never did. Not sure why I did this time except I feel pretty low right now.
I am having a real tough time and feel like I'm falling apart from the inside out. My mom committed suicide recently and I am trying to stay strong. I have 3 kids and they miss their grandmother very bad. I try to stay strong for them and my family.
There are so many times during the day that I just feel like sitting and crying. I visit her grave often, many times asking why? I feel like the life has been sucked out of me but I just keep going. The energy seems to be less and less lately. I'm not sure how long I can keep up with staying strong and not just falling apart.
My mom and I were very close and we shared our thoughts and feelings. She didn't this time or maybe she did and I didn't realize it.
I am so lost.................
 

BrinkOfExistence

Well-Known Member
#2
I'm sorry about your mum, have you had time to properly grieve for your mum? perhaps you could arrange to take some time away from your responsibilities and grieve for your lost without having to put a front on all the time.
 

BrinkOfExistence

Well-Known Member
#4
Well i suppose you could ask family members to take care of your children a couple of days surely it would be understandable and go where ever you may feel happiest.
 

Acy

Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense
ADMIN
#7
I'm so sorry for your loss. :hug: Please know that sometimes people are very good at hiding their suicidal feelings - you are not responsible in any way.

Grief is a process and it takes time - the amount of time varies from person to person. Do you have any family (other than the kids) to talk to? How about some community supports, such as a group of suicide survivors (family/friends of people who have completed suicides)?

And of course, it's really good to see you posting here. I hope you find the support and caring that helps you heal.
 

total eclipse

SF Friend
Staff Alumni
#8
Hi hun glad you posting hun it show others how much devastation is left behind hun. You could not have forseen this hun Your mothers pain just took her away i am sure she did not want this for you this sadness. I loss someone to hun and often blame myself for not seeing any signs Sometimes that person just does not show any okay I do hope you are in time able to honor your mothers memorie keep it alive for her grandchildren. I hope in time your pain is replaced with more happier memories of your mother hun. Have you obtained any grief councilling hun I have and it does help hun you to understand what happen and to see there was nothing you could have done not if it was an impulsive action on your mothers part. Hugs to you
 

jimk

Staff Alumni
#9
welcome corvette. glad you registered here this time. took a big step doing that and starting to try to deal with your heavy loss of your mother.. this is very difficult and going to take some time. Jim
 
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