Made one mistake now I'm spending my entire time regreting it. I spent last night having conversations with my neighbours from my room. Imagine everybody taking a kick at you because of their problem, that's how I feel. Everybody wants to blame somebody they blame me. My life is at a point where nothing realy matters anymore. I came so close to dying that now I'm scared to attempt further suicides. I hate my step father because he didn't let me keep the girl that I loved, he made me give her up, this happend 5 years ago, now I'm ruined, confused, hated, angry, and mad. People got the wrong idea about me, sure I made mistakes but I learn from that, for this I get no respect. I feel so much pain that I don't no how I don't go mad becasue of it. My life goal is to be hated by everybody at least then I know why I'm suffering.