Now I know this might sound strange, but hear me out. I'm suicidal. I broke down when i first admitted that. It showed a side of me, a side that I've brushed off, blocked, or otherwise ignored for most of my life. Right now, I don't feel suicidal, but I know I have the capacity. I came here scared, confused, and bewildered beyond anything I had ever experienced before. Earlier that day, I was crying, and I wasn't knowing why. I cried for things that I knew were painful, but I didn't know what they were. Yet now I live in a much different world. I feel better now. I'm not happy 100%, but I'm on an up. This world has taught me some pretty glum facts, but has also changed my perception on life so that I take very little for granted now. Hell, I don't even say I have good days anymore...cause really, they are impossible. Just a personal thought, but there it is. I have friends that I care deeply about from here. Friends that I look forward to possibly one day meeting them face to face. I don't regret joining SF, and I think that I have changed, matured, or evolved, whatever the term may be. And for right now at least, i feel better for it. This isnt to say this is the end, or even close to it. This is something that wont be cured, wont go away, and it will be a fight. I know im not prepared for it, but at least I know there are people here that will be here for me when i am at my weakest. I am so thankful for them...you have no idea. Thanks SF, and I wanted to open this up to the rest of you. While life gets us down, do you think not only SF, but our own negative thoughts, have...in the end...made us a better person than who we were?