Hate my life!!

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by sigiken, Dec 29, 2007.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. sigiken

    sigiken New Member

    In 2001 my mother died, my dad was an alcoholic, two years ago I found out that I'm gay,
    I fell in love on someone but he rejected me cause he's straight (happened two times)
    I just can't take it anymore, last year I started cutting in my left arm, last month I really started to plan my suicide, I started to cut myself in my wrists, only when I'm doing it, I begin to think like hell and thats where I stop, but I don't know howmuch longer I can take this anymore. School doesnt go well either. And I'm to scared to talk about it to someone.
  2. Wiseblood

    Wiseblood Member

    Stop and think. Which bit are you confused about. Your straight life, or your gay life? You need to answer those questions before you do something rash.
  3. RySp123

    RySp123 Guest

    What exactly cant you take anymore? Being rejected by who you fall in love with? This will happen again and again, over and over again all of your life dear as any ohter person on earth and as well as people will fall in love with you and you will not return their love. We cant love and be love by everyone... yet there is that someone, that special person that will come along and will return and share that love with you and you will forget all those you have loved or wish to be loved from.

    There is no need to be scared talking to someone about how you feel. Either it is a close trusted friend, a sybling or a teacher or councellor at school.

    See dear when you start cutting on your wrists, something stops you and calls you back to 'life' so there must be soemthing ahead of you that you cant focus onto but awating you nonetheless... so go on, do your best and if you have problems at school, why not go talk to the teachers? They are there for that..... and will be please to help you in supplement if you ask them.

    I hope your feeling low will lift so till then, be well and stay safe.

  4. sigiken

    sigiken New Member

    thanks for the fast replies, anyway it will take lots of time to process those things, and probably when I get emotional to much something will happen again, it's just self injury feels hevenly to me. I know it ain't good but I wish I just could be a normal person. My family is verry religious, my dad ain't much better, a soap on television called "thuis", two persons from same sex are in love and when they show there love on tv, my dad starts to say really bad things at them what makes me also scared to tell in my family.

    one year ago, a teacher noticed all the cuts in my arm and he came to me to tell that I should get help, he asked why but I said I do this for fun, the teacher sayd it ain't normal, but he didn't got help for me, the clb in belgium are somehow corrupt, they notifie your parents even if you ask to keep it secret, this happened to my sister-in-law.

    Also alcohol helps to forget it but when I go away from the bar/party, it makes it easier to hurt myselft.

    Can I just ask, would it help if I tell it to my dad about my lifestyle? I'm just affraid what the reaction will be from him.
  5. titanic

    titanic Well-Known Member

    That's a question only you can answer really.
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.