Hate This..

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by absolution, Sep 30, 2010.

  1. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    So about 2 months ago I left home and am now living in another state with my girlfriend and her family. Well i have been starting to feel homesick but i didn't realize how bad until my mom left me a voice mail on my phone and i called her back. Just her voice made me break down and now i cant stop crying. I totally broke down in front of my gf and now she knows im homesick.. I cried the whole time we had together before she had to leave for work and I know i upset her. Its not like I don't like living her because i do. I just really really miss my family.. And its stupid.. Why couldn't i just wait to break down when she left for work? Why did i have to do it in front of her? It seems to be a continuous thing, me hurting her. Everything I do and say comes out wrong. And now she has to go to work upset.. I hate who I am. This goes much deeper than just being homesick. I feel like there is one thread holding my heart together and its about to snap. And I am afraid for what will happen when it finally does. :(
     
  2. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    Sam, you have got stop with this whole 'I'm hurting her' thing.

    The only reason she would be hurt is because she wouldn't want to see you upset and probably feels powerless to help you.

    You guys are in a rough situation at the moment because of your living arrangements, it's not easy. I'm sure she is understanding that it must be difficult for you to be away from home and that sometimes you are going to be hurting. It's not a reflection of your feelings for her.

    Love doesn't cure everything.

    Stop trying to hide things from her, what good is that going to do? I know you are going to say, because then i am not hurting her, right? It doesn't work like that.

    Support eachother and talk to eachother. You are only making this harder on yourselves. This self induced guilt is non productive.

    It's going to be ok Sam but stop fighting this. You are together because you love eachother and you will work things out.

    :hug:
     
  3. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    Her mom kicked me out.. I have to leave without Krista which means i have to go to mass. :cry: I want to just end it.. right now..
     
  4. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    Why Sam?

    Only a few months and she'll be with you again.

    Don't give up when you've got something really good.
     
  5. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    I have to agree with Domo here....don't hide things from her...it won't help..

    Why did her Mum kick you out? doesn't sound fair to me...
    if you don't want to hurt your GF then don't harm yourself ...that will be the worst hurt imaginable for her to live with forever..*hug*
     
  6. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    When you say you are hurting her I see it as the opposite. I think by breaking down in front of her you are showing her just how much you do trust and rely on her. Now, try and see that for yourself too. Keep fighting. Prove it to her over and over again!!!!!!
     
  7. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    Your right guys. Thanks :)

    And she kicked me out because her and her mom got in a fight and im the only thing that her mom has over Krista.. so i have to leave..
     
  8. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy


    Maybe your right. Breaking down in front of her does show that i trust her. Now she is crying and idk what to do >.<
     
  9. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    Just hold her Sam :)
     
  10. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    I did. I cant leave her.. :blub: I suck..
     
  11. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy



    Yeah your right :hug: just its sooo hard
     
  12. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    Stop putting yourself down, it's not going to achieve anything but make you feel worse.

    How about you get off the computer and spend some time together eh?
     
  13. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    I have to look up bus ticket prices for me.. :/
     
  14. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    Well look at the prices and stop wasting time on SF ;)
     
  15. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    LOL I did and its flucking expensive XD
     
  16. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    :laugh: flucking eh?

    Tell her mum that you can't leave because you can't afford it!
     
  17. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    Yes flucking haha :laugh: and her mom wont care. She is a cold heartless bitch :smile:
     
  18. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    Ugh silly woman...you should shank her*




    *Don't shank her, pretty sure that would be illegal :laugh:
     
  19. absolution

    absolution Forum Buddy

    :laugh: whats shank??
     
  20. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    :rofl:

    Like to stab...prison style :laugh: