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hatred towards myself

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by MessengerFromHell, Nov 20, 2013.

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  1. MessengerFromHell

    MessengerFromHell Well-Known Member

    I am unsure abt the purpose of my existence. I am just not as capable as anyone else I see, to each of his own. My existence is a mistake. This world has no place for my scanty talents.

    I have nothing to offer to this world, and when is the day stop hating myself?

    Life is precious. But not mine. I am getting ready for eternal punishment tat is set for me.

    I failed in my relationships, I am weird, ugly and stupid. Like what others said, my existence is a mistake.

    Who says God is perfect? if he even exists? I say tat he had made a mistake and that's me.

    Nobody needs me anyway. I am just a number in this world. A burden. A liability. A coward.

    I will pray that one day I will have the courage to kill myself. If I do, congratulate me.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    NO one will do that here you are not a waste what makes you think you are people who harm you they are the ones that will suffer for the pain they caused you
    each day you stay you win they lose you show them you are someone hugs
  3. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    hi. I am sorry you have been told those things about yourself. Oh you should hear the things some people have said to me. Just as awful and hurtful and painful. And I believed each word. I added it to my collection of reasons to hate myself even more.

    This community is different. No one is going to say mean things to you. The majority of us suffer. Others remember all too well what it is to suffer. Too many of us have had people say cruel things to them. And more sadly, too many of us demean ourselves in very painful ways. Please keep posting here. Become part of this community. Okay? :hug:
  4. MessengerFromHell

    MessengerFromHell Well-Known Member

    Its not what my condition makes me isn't it? Should I be punished for being mentally ill? For possessing below average intelligence when all my siblings are highly intelligent and well liked by other people.

    I don't think I will ever succeed in life. The world needs no me.
  5. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    I do know a similart feeling as what you describe. And it is painful. And yet I hold out a tiny bit of hope that things will change. I honestly dont know if the future will hold more of the past. Or if my some chance things will change. I know it does not seem possible that things will change. But still I do hold out a tiny bit of hope. Coming here does help me. To be with other people who know what it feels like to suffer with this. To be able to talk openly about it. It does help to not have to hide
  6. carnivalofsouls

    carnivalofsouls New Member

    Hi MFH,

    I'm sorry you are feeling so terrible and going through such deep depression. I don't know what Mental Health Services are like in Singapore but I hope you are getting sufficient support.

    I personally don't believe in eternal punishment at all- and I don't think it's a helpful concept for anyone! If you want to talk to me as an anonymous person to confide in- I'll happily listen.

    Best Wishes
  7. MessengerFromHell

    MessengerFromHell Well-Known Member

    Thank you for the kind response.

    I am really really sad to see people who are denied of what I haf, which are merely simple desires in life, they deserve alot than I do.
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