Have a laugh

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Terry

Antiquities Friend
Staff Alumni
#1
HONESTY IS ALWAYS THE BEST POLICY.........BUT IS IT?



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This man thought he had the world's

best tattoo ever..............



............... Until he went to prison!!!!!

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WHY EVERYTHING SHOULD BE SOLD WITH INSTRUCTIONS......



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Love those Computers

For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for
the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on.....


At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly
compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated,

"If ford had kept up with technology like the computer industry
has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the
gallon."

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press
release stating:

If ford had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be
driving cars with the following characteristics (and I just love this
part):

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash........twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road,
close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue.
For some reason you would simply accept this.

4. Occasionally, executing a maneouver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart,
in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy
to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.

6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has
Performed An Illegal Operation" warning light.

I love the next one!!!

7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.

8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you
simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because
none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

10. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.
 
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