Have to go out tomorrow but scared that I can't

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by weevil, Mar 14, 2010.

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  1. weevil

    weevil Well-Known Member

    I had a horrible time living at the shared house I've recently moved out of. The guy taking my room is meant to be moving in tomorrow and I've meant to have gone back to hoover the floor, throw a couple remaining things out and generally make it move in able for him. I assume he still is moving in as nobody's told me otherwise.

    I've been putting it off, I avoid going out anyway but this has been worse over the last week. I'm especially not happy at the thought of going back to that house. I was planning on staying up all night and going first thing in the morning. Staying up all night makes me feel more confident and first thing in the morning means less chance of having to have a conversation with anyone living there. But I'm really worried I won't be able to get out at all... I've really got to do it but I don't think I can.
  2. jnine

    jnine Well-Known Member

    would it help,
    can you find someone to go with you?

    i did read the not hving to have a conversation part but maybe someone of your choosing woudn't be so bad?
  3. weevil

    weevil Well-Known Member

    Oh yes its the people in the house specificly that I want to avoid, but there isn't anyone realisticly that could come with me, especially first thing in the morning.
  4. jnine

    jnine Well-Known Member

    sorry, it isn't easy to get people to go somewhere wth short notice, specially early but having a commitment with people helps me sometimes,

    maybe you could find someone/something for later in the afternoon, after your early spiffy up thing? sort of carrot and a stick all in one?

    ....i'm sorry, i say things so wrong sometimes, maybe some one who can help will respond,
    i will hope so for you
  5. weevil

    weevil Well-Known Member

    You didn't say the wrong thing! :) Just there isn't really anyone that could come.

    Going back home afterwards is probably what I'd like most to be honest, I really don't want to be out at the moment, especially in daylight, unless I took myself off to the cinema or something but I don't know.
  6. jnine

    jnine Well-Known Member

    i can understand not wanting to be out, i hope you can find some way to get done all you need,

    if you can't get it done what might happen?
  7. weevil

    weevil Well-Known Member

    Thats what I'm worried about, would the landlord try and keep some of my deposit if it's not totally spotless? Could I appeal that due to being afraid to leave my flat?

    If I knew I could stay in and not have to see or speak to anyone else I think I might feel okay. I'm only feeling so anxious because I'm supposed to be going outside, in the daylight, to a place that terrifies me, where I might have to have a conversation with someone I don't want to see.

    I sent a text message to my landlord explaining this and I'm afraid to read her reply. The ex housemate I mentioned tried to phone me earlier in the week, then sent a text and I only got the courage to read it this morning. It just said to phone her which there's noway I'm doing.
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 15, 2010
  8. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    Did you manage to go?
  9. weevil

    weevil Well-Known Member

    Nope, I don't think it will happen, I can't even read my landladys text reply.

    AHHH phew! There's been a hold up with him moving in which should be sorted in the next few days, so I'm saved for today!

    Of course I'm not saved forever but it's at least a little bit of relief.
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 15, 2010
  10. weevil

    weevil Well-Known Member

    I am never going to be able to go there.

    I had an appointment this morning, the first on a condition management program. It was my first time outside in daylight since monday last week. I lasted an hour. I was told there wouldn't be group exercises, just a classroom setting where we sit and listen. The first thing they did was make us do something in pairs. I can't handle that. I went outside and couldn't go back in. It was so bad that outside was the preferable place to be.

    So if I can't even do that I'm never going to be able to get back inside that house.
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