Have you ever cried so much you start laughing hysterically...

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Haunteddaily, Sep 30, 2015.

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  1. Haunteddaily

    Haunteddaily New Member

    Well this just happened to me.

    I started bawling out of the sheer frustration and loneliness that I feel. There are so many reasons for this and each of them are so utterly pathetic I just started laughing at my self.

    I am a person that tends to over-think things. I have come up with a way of life that should have led to my happiness but it has only resulted in anxiety, depression and f**king confusion. I feel that if I ever acquire said happiness I should deserve it. So I treat others, with Buddha's tenacity, as I want to be treated. But at the same time, never have I put others' needs before my own ( Selfish maybe, but I still treat people better then they f**king treat me). Oh and of course I'm honest to a fault and a non-conformist.

    Now that you know about me I NEED HELP! I am so f**king lonely. I have always had a relatively positive self-image even when I may not be beautiful. I have never had a real boyfriend (or girlfriend) and this is not for lack of trying. I have been rejected by so many people. I don't even have close friends to confide in and laugh away my sorrows. I just HATE MY LIFE! I don't know what to do any more. The more I think and the more I try, the deeper my pain delves.

    I constantly discuss this with my family but they are clueless as to what to do and are more concerned about themselves - which is painfully understandable. I have also tried professional help but the bulls**t they spew has never done anything except deplete my bank account.

    While my problems are miniscule to those that many have, I can't help but feel this way.

    I WANT FRIENDS, I WANT A BOYFRIEND AND WANT SOMEONE TO VALIDATE MY F**KING EXISTENCE!

    Please tell me what to do.
     
  2. Essiy

    Essiy Member

    Hey there, Haunted. I know exactly how you feel. I actually had to leave work after only two hours yesterday because I broke down a few times. Reading what you wrote sounds so familiar to what I'm going through. I'm also the kind of person who tends to "think too much". I've been depressed almost my entire life, this is all I know now. I see what you said about the doctors and it's painful to hear someone else feels the same way.

    I have this belief that problems are problems, no matter how small.

    I'm sorry I can't tell you what to do, because I'm in a similar situation and I'm still struggling to find my own answer. My own suicidal thoughts have been coming back and I'm trying my best to hold on, so I can't promise I'll ever be back. But please shoot a message my way. We're all in pain in our own ways and nobody's problems are less than others. If you'd like to talk to someone, I'm here.
     
  3. NYJmpMaster

    NYJmpMaster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    Nobody can validate your existence but yourself. What somebody else thinks of you is a transient thing constantly changing and growing or diminishing in worth based on every encounter or every day apart and everything they learn about you to be true or not true. What matters is if you know yourself. When people say they hate their life , which is virtually everybody at some periods of time in their life- I would suggest instead of amassing it all into one huge complex thing you break things down into manageable pieces and and decide which things you actually hate about your life , which are just not as great as they could be and which things are actually okay or good.

    When thinking about it all at once it is "everything is horrible"- but if you actually break it down into all the things you are involved in in a week or think about in a week there are usually some glaring issues. In your case perhaps it is lack of friends, but I would be guessing. Then take that small part and realistically decide what changes you can make to influence that area of your life. Unfortunately, in the end, it will always come down to what changes we cna make for ourselves to improve things- because expecting the rest of the world to change is what we are doing if we change nothing but want our life to change, and that just does not happen no matter how long we wait for it to.

    More importantly perhaps, take some of the small parts that are not horrible about your life or yourself in your own opinion, maybe looks , maybe where live - no clue but you will find some things that if were taken away or changed would hurt or suck even worse- and these are your strengths so figure out ways to be more involved in those areas or to highlight those areas in your week and day . Fixing ones life all at once is impossible, fixing a couple small things that make life incrementally better and having faith that if you make enough things incrementally better then things will in fact improve is not impossible, and once you start it is much easier.

    Take Care and Be Safe

    - Ben
     
  4. WhoDoctor

    WhoDoctor New Member

    Hi,let me tell you that the same thing is happenning to my,felling alone and hopelles,felling that you not belong where you are and that you are not the person that you really can be,blaming at anything.Thats why I enter here,where you people know what it feels,and I think that together we can solve this problemes,we are not alone in this place,YOU are not alone.
     
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