on sunday night i was attacked (incase ur wondering im a guy) to cut a long story short... i was grabbed from behing by 2 guys with an arm tightly round my throat who sneaked up behind me. i tried to get our of the arm lock and as a result i got punched in the nuts, stomach, back, ribs reallly hard and a lot of times, they favourd my nuts tho. they hancufed my hands behing my back, gagged me and put a mask over my mouth and nose covered in poppers. they then proceded to pull my trackiee bottoms and underware and proceded to crush and punch my balls many times more along with other punches elcewhere. at some stage with me struggling to breath and massivly panicing they drag/push me down a muddy path and make me lie on the ground. they then forcee themself inside me and fuck me, i pass out several times and they carry on fucking me up my arse punch me more then cum inside me then remove the hancuffs and walk off. If you want to see the full details look at my thread in the Depression forum on the 10th dec called 'please help me (may trigger)' It does have some important background info but im not writing it out again, it took long enough last time Now I know I was technically raped. but even tho it was horrible at the time and i wanted it to stop, when i think about it now It really turns me on and gets me all excited and horny and i want it to happen again. i dont know while im feeling like this. i was very depressed before this happned and i still am but this dosent seem to have had the slightest impact on me except for several very painfull bruises, im not into pain by the way I just dont understand why i feel like this. What i would like to know is, have any of you ever felt like this before? or have any idea why im feeling this way? Or am i just some perverted, twisted fucked up individual??