I haven't posted here in a long time. I moved to a different location and my life changed for a while. Now I'm facing up to all the things that I swept under the rug so that I could get through day by day. I've never felt such loathing for myself. What I've done to the people around me, for so long, is just horrible. I feel like my personality is gone and I'm too old to try to get the pieces all together. I don't think this even makes much sense. I like to write in generalities so that no one knows what I'm talking about. Just barely hanging on, but to what, I don't know.