He doesn't know.

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by bleedinblackandwhite, Sep 7, 2009.

  1. I'm happy.
    I laugh.
    I enjoy school, and have a lot of friends.
    On the outside.
    I get home, and have only one best friend that I can talk to about anything.
    He knows about everything wrong with me, about how I want to die.

    I can't die, though. I don't want to hurt my boyfriend, or others...
    He'd kill himself.
    He's too dependent on me...
    He's too bright. Too brilliant to go to waste.
    I can't leave because I don't want him to.
    How do I do what I need to do without killing him? And hurting everyone?

    I wish there was a way to do it where nobody would ever remember me ever again...
  2. CAD

    CAD Well-Known Member

    Then get some therapy and help yourself for his sake.
  3. hardcore

    hardcore Well-Known Member

    ugh, that is how i feel. I feel like if I went through with it that I would be as bad as a murderer. How could I have any self respect and hurt so many people like that?