I just got a call from the hospital. He's alive, wow I am so relieved. I started balling on the phone with the nurse, saying he's going to hate me so much. She told me that this was probably one of the most heroic things I've ever done and I should be so proud of myself. I saved his life, and I feel like I failed him so miserably, but at least he's alive to hate me. I want him in my life forever, but I have a feeling that he isn't going to want me there anymore. Well, anyways, I guess we'll see if it's true. Thanks everyone <3 at least I will be able to get a little sleep tonight.