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He Still Wants His Ex

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by darkgirlforever, Jun 27, 2012.

  1. darkgirlforever

    darkgirlforever Active Member

    I'm here because i'm confused about the current relationship i am in. My boyfriend just admitted to me that he is still not over his ex and that he still misses her and that the only reason he is not with her is because she will not take him back.. My question is what should i do. I don't know if i can be in a relationship where i'll always know that i'm second best. Should i dump him or continue the relationship to see if he can get over her?
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    i wrote a response but commuter site is so slow yes dump him hun his heart is not with you and you deserve better then second best hun. He is not moving forward so you have to ok find someone that loves you and only you
  3. justMe7

    justMe7 Well-Known Member

    Noo :( If he's not in the relationship for just you, then there is no real relationship. I really am sorry, but I would really suggest splitting up. You deserve to be with someone that cares and wants you. In a relationship there are no second bests.
  4. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Eccentric writer, general weirdo, heedless heathen

    Dump him...I mean his heart is not with you...he is still into her...so you will end up being hurt. Best to just end it because you deserve someone who will only love you, not have feelings for someone else.
  5. Prinnctopher's Belt

    Prinnctopher's Belt Antiquities Friend SF Supporter

    I agree with everyone else. By any means necessary, you must sever this now.
  6. red ribbons

    red ribbons Well-Known Member

    DUMP the SOB and find someone who doesn't string you along and play games with you! Some one who doesn't try to play you off another person for their own sick sense of gratification. Been there-didn't know what I was getting into but it further traumatized me!! A relationship like that will only add to your depression. Do not let him use you-that's abuse. He will dump you fast if his ex lets him back into her life.
  7. synchrohobbit

    synchrohobbit Active Member

    I absolutely don't want to defend him, and the relationship I was in that started this way is now over, but he may just be trying to share his feelings. It all depends what context this is in, i.e. if he texts it to you or if it is something that seemed truly difficult for him to get out. Is his previous relationship recent, or long gone? I also wonder about your wording "she WILL not take him back." If he really used the present tense like that, which sounds like he is still trying, that is not fair to you. But if it really was in the past and you guys are getting along well you can see what happens.
  8. ksmith86

    ksmith86 Well-Known Member

    I disagree with everyone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    His ex is gone and probably isn't ever coming back. He tells you because he trusts you. If you really see a future with him then just wait, build a new relationship with him and eventually she will fade into the background. EVERYBODY has their baggage and if that's the worst he's got, and he's good to you, then count yourself lucky :) But that of course all depends on what your relationship is like with him.

    My only concern would be how much access he has to her. If she's still popping in and out of his life, THEN maybe you need to threaten to leave. Make him think about what he has rather then what he's lost.