He'll break my heart

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by No_Angel, Apr 8, 2009.

  1. No_Angel

    No_Angel Member

    I've chatting with a guy since this January when I invited him to go ice-skating.He refused and i had forgot the whole story until he called me last Saturday and we went out.
    And he is really perfect ,intelligent and gentle and he says he likes me and that he wants to be with me...
    The problem is that I'm 23-years old and I've never had a boyfriend and I feel like a total loser,I have extremely low self-esteem - I think I'm not attractive enough to be with him , it terrifies me that will see the stretch marks on my thighs and realize how disgusting I really am.I don't want him to leave because of the way I look , I would agree with any other reasons but this one.
    I seriously think that I should forget about him before he breaks my heart.
     
  2. cult logic

    cult logic Staff Alumni

    I'm no expert on relationships, but why don't you just take your chances?

    Just have some fun and don't put your whole heart into it.

    If it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out.

    Though if he would leave solely based on somethng so trivial he is immature and likely not worth your time.
     
  3. No_Angel

    No_Angel Member

    Well , a week later we went to the mountain ang things got pretty hot.I explained to him how messed up I am ,he told me that I worried too much ,how attractive and smart I am ,men lie so much when they are turned on...A woman called him and I gave him a look , he said it was his sister and offerred m to redial and ask her if he was lying.

    But yesterday I bumped him on the street and he was with another woman and I just said high and got on the bus like some freakin' teeanage girl.
    So,he's texting me today like nothing has happened.

    The problem is that I didn't behave ladylike at all and I don't even want to think what he's thinking of me , and I don't know what is going between us .It works for me if it's only phisical but I won't put up with being a reserve player.

    We have only seen each other twice but we definitely went too far , when should I ask him how it's going to be , or should not ask anything at all .
     
  4. wheresmysheep

    wheresmysheep Staff Alumni

    thing is, even skinny girls have stretch marks, and cellulite. so you shouldnt be worried about them quite frankly if he was to leave you cause of them, then he's not worth it.

    i really think you need to adress your paranoia and insecurities here, do you go to therapy? if you do ask your therapist for some help, if you dont, look into seeing a behavoural therapist.

    in regards to teh guy, call him, ask him where he's sees the pair of you then you'll stop thinking your second guessing yourself.

    you never know untill you ask
     
  5. EndlessRain

    EndlessRain Member

    It seems strange to say because everyone says it, or has heard it at some point. But there is nothing to be insecure about. Everyone has bad things about their body, or at least in their eyes, and everyone has wonderful things, even when they don't see it. Our bodies are so inconsistant, always changing... In 20 years or 40 years you will change so much. Anyone that wants to be with you because of how your flesh is shaped, or puts you down because of it, is not worth a second thought.

    I don't have much experience with women and relationships to speak from, but I do know that if someone can break your heart over something so silly, you really are better off without them in your life.

    As for the other girl... it could have been the sister he told you had called. You never know. You can simply ask him, or just see how it goes. But definately don't let yourself become a "reserve player" as you put it. No one deserves that, either!
     
  6. Young suicider

    Young suicider Well-Known Member

    god trust me don't take your chances,you'll end up like me,if you feel you need to end it end it