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Hello All!

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New Member
I really do not know what to say here. I do have a lot to live for. My two boys and wife of 11 years. Its selfish of me to think of leaving them alone but I know they would be better off without me.

I have been fighting with bipolar and depression for about 20 years now. I finally sought out help and spent nine days in a mental hospital. Things were ok until I came home. Here I am reminded of every failure I have ever had. The misdemeanor assault charge (14 years ago) that keeps me from gaining employment.

The government took my CDL license to drive a truck because I am a diabetic so I put myself back through school and now I am two classes from my Masters degree. A degree that is completely useless.

I am tired of fighting the fight. I have lost my will to live and I do not know how much longer I will be here with you all.

I sm not here for a pitty party, I have just given up on the fight to survive.
hello and welcome!

I think it's pretty much universal that people who feel suicidal feel like there is no other way out

I think that may not be true though, so please give us a chance to help!

we might be able to show you a new perspective, and also be able to help out with practical issues

I'm too tired right now to write more

I hope that you can get better soon!


Staff Alumni
Hi and welcome and so glad you found us...I am sure that your family would not be better off without you...I think sometimes we forget that we are not our diagnosis, and that we can be productive (e.g. Masters degree? quite impressive)...hope you continue to post and tell us how we can support you..welcome again, J

total eclipse

SF Friend
Staff Alumni
Hi you i have to say this your family will NOT be the same or better off without you they will live in sadness and in doubt for the rest lives You will pass on suicidal tendencies to your children There is help hun talk to someone okay get some therapy try new meds . YOur depression is distorting your thinking your family needs you here with them
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