Hello all. I've joined the forums for a couple of reasons. For as long as I remember I've wanted to cease living. I was about 5 when I first thought about suicide. In any case it's become clear to me that I'm just a big puss and I can't physically man up and do the deed. So I got the idea that maybe if I make a difference in other peoples lives who are dealing with the same or similar issues, I can not only be helping them but in turn seeing more value in my own existence. My name is Jake by the way, and I'm into the arts a lot: Comedy, I make heavy music, I'm getting into writing screenplays. Things of that nature.