Hello everybody

Discussion in 'Welcome' started by jdb, Aug 29, 2008.

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  1. jdb

    jdb Member

    Hello,

    I'm 32 and I suffer from depression and anxiety disorder since I was a child. My depression and anxiety was triggered by traumatic early life experiences. My parents had good intentions but lacked parental skills, and when I finally understood how much of my own mess was due to theirs, it was a bit too late to make it work. So nowdays that I understand things (how and why I got to be who I am) its like there's no energy and faith to make things work.

    When I wake up everyday I feel afraid of what future will bring. After being down for years, it's time to move on, but I'm so afraid of failing again that the bad feeling I get when I wake up just continues clouding every single idea that crosses my mind. I feel sad most the time, I don't like myself much, specially because I've never managed to fulfill my potential as an adult male.

    I've been alone for years now. I live with my parents, I have no job, no girl-friend. I have people I could consider friends, but still have no new year eve's party to go to. I guess it's one of the things that hurt me the most, not having friends with whom to celebrate new year.
    Just like in the relationships department, there are things that don't happen on their own if you're withdrawn. But that's what I do most of the time, I avoid relationships because I'm afraid of exposing myself, since some have made me feel really bad about myself.

    Things were never this bad for such a long time, and I find myself contemplating departure because I doubt I'll ever manage to overcome the sadness and hopelessness. Forcing myself into mild "positive" action makes me feel worse. Yet I know I must go through it, get used to feel even worse for things to get better someday.

    That's it for now. Thanks.

    Pedro
     
  2. Robin

    Robin Guest

    You might not find answers to your suffering here or anywhere for that matter but you have a good chance of making some friends :) If you need a friend just drop me a pm :)

    Welcome to the forum :)
     
  3. Colourful

    Colourful Well-Known Member

    I can relate to how you avoid relationships because you're afraid...i'm kind of like that too.

    I hope things get better for you, in the meantime welcome and enjoy your stay! :)

    xx
     
  4. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    :welcome: to the forum.I hope we can help support you. :hug:
     
  5. Anime-Zodiac

    Anime-Zodiac Well-Known Member

    Welcome to SF.

    Enjoy.
     
  6. jdb

    jdb Member

    Thank you.
     
  7. Insignificant

    Insignificant Account Closed

    :welcome: to the forum. continue to share as you need. we will be here to listen. please take care and stay safe
     
  8. BioHomocide

    BioHomocide Well-Known Member

    Hello & Welcome. ^0^ :hug:
     
  9. LenaLunacy

    LenaLunacy Well-Known Member

    Welcome to the forum. I hope you find the support you need here :)
     
  10. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    welcome to the forum :welcome:
     
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