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Hello. I need to vent.

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I don't have enough money to entertain happily. I don't have close friends. I can't open my heart. I would sweat overly occasionally when I'm in some social situation. Even my family members don't trust me enouth, because they don't think I'm socially wise and I'm already 28. Thus I don't have a girlfriend. Nevertheless, I'm sex addicted. I feel so tortured. I feel so helpless. When I see someone has a beautiful wife and a good life, I think I have to hide myself underground. I wish to end my life several times a day.

I know I had chances to achieve better status, cause I have some rich relatives and I have an IQ of being over 130. But my divorced parents had messed our whole life up. I haven't been an Iron will man, and I have been easily indecisive and passive, so I couldn't persist on doing something confidently for a long time.

I always guess I deserve to be sentenced to death for my useless personality.


Staff Alumni
Hi and welcome...when we are hurt by the actions of others, especially our parents, this is very difficult to overcome, especially when viewing ourselves as useless and to blame...there is a vast difference between sex and intimacy, and many people use sex to disguise intimacy issues...also, people 'sleep around' so that they feel 'bad' about themselves...controlling the shame by doing things that evoke the emotion so that the emotion feels more controllable...I have done this myself in the past, and know what a nightmare it is to live with these feelings...please see if you can find more understanding for yourself, and know there are many people who feel as you do...welcome again, J


Staff Alumni
HI Lost in Vain.. welcome to the forums here.. also think you should try to get a bit of professional help for yourself.. thru a mental health center may be very helpful for you.. you deserve this and getting someone wise and knowlegable on your side for a change can make a world of difference ..

lot of good people on here.. many who have traveled some of the same paths that you have .. we do understand some.. tc, Jim


Staff Alumni
Welcome. I've been pretty down on myself lately too. I can understand where you're coming from with some of what you described.. especially the part about not feeling good about your personality. I feel the same way about mine. ~ With caring....Alex
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