Hi. I'm new. I googled about feeling lonely and having suicidal thoughts and a link to this forum came up in the results. I had a read through and thought it might help me to talk to people here. Briefiy, I'm 55. I live alone. I've 2 grown up sons - one lives in another country with his wife and they have a little girl. I see them about every 6 months. My youngest son (age 30) has severe mental health problems (schizophrenia). I'm his carer. He lived with me up to a few months ago when he got supported housing. Now I'm fully on my own I feel I've achieved nothing since I was a teenager - I'm back where I was living in a small flat. I have no partner, I never had time as a carer. All my energy was put into caring for my son (he had several suicide attempts himself). Anyway I have felt dreadful lately - very lonely, tearful. Planning suicide - I think people would be better off without me. I feel ashamed to feel like this. It's all a mess.