Hello, SF

Discussion in 'Welcome' started by khlide, Oct 2, 2010.

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  1. khlide

    khlide Member

    :hiya:

    I guess I'll start off with saying that I've joined this forum as a last resort and that it wasn't an easy decision.

    I never 'reach out' to people because I know there are people in the world that have lives ten times worse than mine. It always has me questioning myself, like, 'what right do I have to hate any aspect of my own?'. I don't want anyone telling me that I'm right, that I have no reason to be upset over anything because I've lived a good life - one that anyone would be lucky to have.

    That's all fine and dandy but the fact is that although I feel 'blah' right now and have actually been happy with my life the past year, some time last month I realized I'm going downhill emotionally and it's freaking me out x1000 - moreso now since I've been crying daily over the same things this past week which is one big friggin' sign to me that I'm not getting any better.

    The more I think about suicide, the more I seriously consider it and feel like there's no other way. In the past whenever I'd have suicidal thoughts I knew deep down I'd never attempt it – I always had this small glimmer of hope that at least ONE PERSON out there would seriously be affected by my death...I lived for them. NOW? That 'glimmer' is starting to disappear. My 'will to live' is starting to as well – that's why I've joined this forum.

    I.DON'T.WANT.TO.DIE.
    Well, I don't want to, but then again I do. I feel as if I'm fighting myself.

    Since I can't talk to anyone I know about these feelings (not anymore) I'm hoping people here can help me.
     
  2. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    :welcome: to SF. You have every right to be here and talk about how you feel. You shouldn't compare your issues to that of someone else as things affect us each differently. What may be a life changing thing for one person may not have the slightest effect on someone else. And something seen as major to them, may be small for you. What is important is that you are feeling desperate enough that you are having difficulties coping. Feel free to share with us. We all have things we are trying to deal with in our own ways. Maybe someone can relate to you and give you the support you need to make it through. You have taken the first and most difficult step. You have reached out for help. I hope we are able to provide it for you. Take care. :hug:
     
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hi glad you reached out here for support
     
  4. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Welcome to the forums!! Keep posting.. I'm sure you will find support here...
     
  5. stig

    stig Well-Known Member

    hello and welcome to the forum. you have come to the right place. there are a lot of people here using this forum. people from all walks of life and from all age ranges. we all have various problems and issues.
    as Gentlelady posted, what is bad for one person might not affect another. stay strong, stay safe.
     
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