I am not in crisis but I have struggled this past year more than ever with feeling I have no purpose or reason. I am afraid to tell my therapist or psychiatrist when I am having intense thoughts of harming myself so when in the moment I am on my own and this adds to my depression. When I talk about it (usually a week or so later) I downgrade how I felt because I'm afraid of being put in the hospital. I guess I'm here to have somewhere to feel safe to let my feelings out when I am feeling unsafe so it doesn't build up. The weekends are the hardest for me.