Hi. My name is Alen and I'm a 24 year old male from Slovenia. I've been battling depression since I was a child, now that I'm older, I have basic understanding of my condition. Also, I'm pretty new at this, talking about my feelings, I never did it before. Since this is anonyomous I'm having an easyer time doing it, so here it goes... A few years ago I tried <Mod edit- Methods>. I was very determined and wanted to succeed. The feelings I felt are back and are worse than ever and I can't deal with it alone anymore. I don't really know how to talk about my feelings... I'm pretty much unable to. Nobody really knows how I feel since i never told anyone. I also have severe anxiety and it's getting worse, it's gotten to a point that I can't even go to the grocery store without feeling confident. I've been locked up in my room with almost zero light because I can't stand to look at my self... as a result of this, my skin looks very pale. I've been self-harming myself since i was 14 years old, primarily I've been cutting myself. Actually, I didn't cut myself for a long time now, until today. My right arm has over 100 scars on it, there are also burn marks. Depression has completly destroyed my life, it made me quit school, ruined any relationship i ever had, I have zero will to do anything but spend time in my room. I've been having suicidal toughts and I can't take it, I can't take it anymore, I need to talk to someone and I don't know how... There's so much stuff I need to tell, need to release and if I won't be able to, I don't see any other way. I can't take it anymore, I never felt so bad in my life. I need help and I don't know where to look for it. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.