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Discussion in 'Welcome' started by amy-lou, Jun 15, 2007.

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  1. amy-lou

    amy-lou Member

    hi, erm, first of all, I have chosen to remain anonymous, so amylou isn't my real name...

    erm, well, I don't really know what to put here... I came to this site because for about 4 months I've been searching for serious help, which I just cannot find anywhere. I tried emailing Samaritans, but they are so cold and impersonal, that it just made me feel worse - I felt simply like a number... There's absolutely no way I could talk to my parents or family,and my friends well... there's only one I would want to tell this to. But, bless her, she's going through so much herself at the moment, I don't want to add to her worries. Teachers/school are absolutely out of the question - I could never talk to people I barely know and have no training in this sort of thing at all...

    For so long I have wanted to go to the a doctor, and finally actually see someone about this, but every time I am about to go, I feel like I would be wasting their time - I'm not really depressed, maybe Im just over emotional or moody?

    That is my main problem. Most of the time, I do not believe that I am depressed. Even though I break down up to 3 times a week, and am constantly thinking of suicide, I cant help but just think that I am simply being ridiculously over sensitive and emotional. I was ditched by all of my best friends a few years ago which was the beginning of a long series of events which caused my "depression". They ditched me, because they said i was moody - and so I constantly question, "maybe I am actually just moody? I became "depressed" after they ditched me, so what was making me so moody before?" The ony logical answer I can htink of, is that I have always been this way...

    I just don't know what to do anymore. I desperatley want to seek help, but I do not want to simply be another hormonal teenager being silly and thinking shes depressed,wasting everyones time...
  2. Hazel

    Hazel SF & Antiquitie's Friend Staff Alumni

    Hello Amy-lou and welcome to Sf, I am sorry that you have been going through such a tough and lonely time recently. Lonely because you feel you have no one to talk to, about how you feel, I hope that now you have found Sf that you will feel able to talk to us and that you will find us to be helpful and supportive.
    I hope that you will decide to go see your doctor, your doctor will not think you are 'wasting his time' you could tell him how you feel and let him decide if you are depressed or not.

    No one at Sf is going to think you are,
    I look forward to seeing you around the forum.

    Take care
    Hazel :hug:
  3. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    :welcome: to the forum amy-lou. I agree with Hazel. You should go to your doctor and tell him what and how you feel. They may suggest some things to help out and you can get a diagnosis if you are depressed. It can heappen to anyone. I look forward to seeing you around the forum more. Take care. :hug:
  4. lost_soul

    lost_soul Staff Alumni

    i agree with hazel and genlelady. you should probably see a doctor. :welcome:to the forum. hope to see you often. be good to yoourself:)
  5. rd9671

    rd9671 Guest

    Hey amy-lou, I would have to agree with hazel and GL. It is very important that you seek some medical attention. Starting with your family doctor is good, however, I would ask him for a referral to a psychiatrist. I say this in the same way that if your dr. suspected a brain tumor, you would not have him do the brain surgery; you would see a brain surgeon. It is just a matter of specialty. A psychiatrist can accurately diagnose and monitor your symptoms better than a family doc. And please give some consideration to therapy too. while all of these things are difficult and they take a lot of time initially it can be worth the effort. I did these things and I finally have some answers to why I am the way I am, it helps to understand the illness as well as the treatment options.
    I wish you good luck and hope to see you around.
  6. Wonderstuff

    Wonderstuff Staff Alumni

    Welcome to the forum, amylou :)
    I think a lot of us have doubted the reality of our depression at some point, but that is part of the nature of the disease, I think. You really should see a doctor. A good doctor really can make the world of difference :)
    And of course, we will provide as much support as we can here, too.
    Please let us know what you decide :hug:
    Take care,

  7. theleastofthese

    theleastofthese SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Dear AmyLou. YOu're not wasting my time. I don't think you're just "another moody teenager". Depression is a very real illness and a lot of us suffer from it. I would strongly recommend seeing a doctor, a professional therapist, for it if that's possible. Please don't blame yourself for your condition. It's an illness just as cancer and other physical illnesses. Treatment and sometimes medication are essential to getting thru it. Welcome to the site.:smile: This place saved my life when I came here and I'm sure we can be of help to you.:smile:

  8. amy-lou

    amy-lou Member

    wow, I honestly wasn't expecting everyone to be so helpful and supportive, I though if I was lucky I would get maybe two or three replies...

    you all said that I should see a doctor... have any of you done that? I would like to, but it just seems so intimidating and unnerving. I cant even tell my best friend how I feel, how will I tell a doctor? :S
    And it's so hmmm - for me it's strange, because I will have a period of feeling extremely down, whether its a couple of hours or a few days, but then I'll be fine again; this is why I don't think that it's really depression... like, at the moment, I'm absoltuely fine - the thought of suicide is just - I'm indifferent to it, I suppose...
    And then I think, maybe I did have depression, but not anymore... a while ago I went through a phase where I just wanted to sleep literally all the time, and I thought "if I don't wake up, it doesn't matter" Maybe that was depression - but now? Now I don't know...
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