For the past year my life has been something quite similar to Hell, who knows, it might even be so. I am only thirteen but yet have gone through depression, cutting, burning, almost killing myself (and others) as well as ODing and having many a friend with worser lives than mine. My life though, isn't that bad. I live in a perfect town, attend a perfect school, have the right kind of friends and belong to a perfectly functional family. So why can't I be happy with what I have like so many peers of mine? Right now I'm dealing with thoughts of suicide, burning/cutting and getting over my little bro's car crash (he lived, but I don't think he should have). It's hard for me to believe that we all actually exist, that I exist, and that I have a past and present such as so. I can't tell if this is all a fantasy or if I'm actually here and breathing. Please help me. Please.