Discussion in 'Welcome' started by stupidfrombirth, May 8, 2009.

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  1. Hi. I'm Steve. I've lost all hope. Long story. I've searched the Bible for an encouraging word but it's not there. Hoping someone here has an encouraging word.
  2. Hazel

    Hazel SF & Antiquitie's Friend Staff Alumni

    Hello Steve and welcome to Sf, we might not have all the answers but we are here to listen, help and support you.
    When you feel ready perhaps you would like to tell us your 'story'.

  3. Anime-Zodiac

    Anime-Zodiac Well-Known Member

    Welcome to the forums.
  4. I'll try to keep it short:

    I had a verbally abusive mother. I hated her. She called me "stupid" all the time. Once in 3rd grade, I had trouble adjusting to a new school. The teacher verbally abused me, and I started tearing up. In front of the whole class, she said maybe we should change (part of) my last name to "baby". That was my fucking name until I finished there in 7th grade. I told my parents about it, and my fucking mother supported that fucking witch, saying I deserved it. So I grew up with HUGE self-image/ paranoia problems my whole childhood, never fitting in. Mother died when I was 14, and I celebrated....I did horrible in school because I just didn't care. Any opportunities I've had to make something of myself I screwed up. I didn't finish college. I got married, she left me after 11 months because she was fucking somebody else within 2 months of our wedding. Five years later, I get married to my present wife. Guess what? She's just like my MOTHER!!! I hate her!!! Been married 23 years. What a horrible time. Like my name says, I'm so stupid, I go and marry someone just like my mother who I hated! I hate my life. All that keeps me going is two beautiful kids, 13 and 8. If they weren't around, I'd already be dead. My wife basic mantra is to verbally abuse me, blame everything that goes wrong on me, controlling my thoughts and feelings. I do all the fucking cleaning the house, most of the carrying around the kids, half the cooking. I'm also in school taking 3 classes while having a fulltime job and a part time job. She works 24 hours a week and parks her ass on the couch watching TV while I do everything. Then she'll surf the net, play spider solitaire for hours upon hours. Then she complains about working too hard, life being too busy, then tells me I have no right to complain about my schedule. She's a manipulator. In counseling, I told our counelor I needed her to be supportive, more of a positive person, an encourager. She told the counselor she was not willing to do that for me, since he is just not that type of person. Oh yeah, she wants to take 3 to 4 nice vacations per year, and gets mad when I tell her we take too many vacations and can't spend the money on practical things.I could go on and on, but you get the message.
  5. Blue bell

    Blue bell Active Member

    hi and welcome to SF

    all i can say is keep talking here and let people support you

    Blue bell
  6. Jehuty

    Jehuty Senior Member

    Hey and welcome to SF Steve!

    We're happy you visit us for support.
    We will do our very best to support you in any way possible.

    If you want to talk to someone please send me or someone else a message and we'll do our best to help you.
    My message box is open 24 hours a day and 7 days a week. :)
    Also be sure to join the SF chat for support or if you just want to chat.

    Take care,
  7. ~Claire

    ~Claire Well-Known Member

    Welcome to SF Steve.

    Like Hazel said we may not have the answers but we will certainly listen to you & support you.

    :hug: xx
  8. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hi Steve,

    welcome to the forum :)
  9. mdmefontaine

    mdmefontaine Antiquities Friend

    hi steve

    welcome to s.f.

    i hope you find support here. thanks for sharing your difficult situation.
    we are all here to listen to you, and we do care about you.
    pm if you want to talk . . . xx:console:
  10. Aurora Gory Alice

    Aurora Gory Alice Well-Known Member

    Hi Steve,
    Sounds like you have had it rough from day one, but that doesn't make you stupid. From what I can tell you've been ill-treated and manipulated and your kindness has been taken for granted.

    It might take all your power and all your being to stand up to your wife, you may have to pull out some power from a place you didn't even know you had it, but tell yourself YOU DO NOT DESERVE TO BE TREATED LIKE THIS. You're human - just like her, and you deserve a little respect.

    You used the words 'she is controlling my thoughts and feelings'. Only YOU can control your thoughts and feelings because she isn't the gatekeeper to your brain, to your emotions. You own them, you control them, they are yours.
    I know it'll be hard to push past that barrier, but you can do it!
  11. kriss.diablo

    kriss.diablo Active Member

    hi Steve, I'm new too. Welcome!
  12. Remedy

    Remedy Chat & Forum Buddy

    Welcome to SF Steve! :)
    Hope you find what you're looking for here. :hug:
  13. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    Hey Steve, welcome to SF!!

    I'm so sorry you're being treated that way. You don't deserve that.

    If you ever feel like talking, or just need to vent, you can PM me anytime. I hope you find friendship and support here.
  14. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    :welcome: to the forum Steve. I am glad you chose to seek out support. :hug:
  15. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Hi and welcome to the forums!!
  16. yursomedicated

    yursomedicated Chat & Forum Buddy

    Hi Steve.

    Everyone here at SF can help you any time you need.

    PM me if you are feeling lonely.
  17. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    Welcome to SF! You'll find lots of supportive people here. You don't deserve the name you've given yourself. (I hope that SF helps you find a way to change it.) :smile:
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