I recently turned 18 and spent my birthday alone in my room. I am just so depressed with life I dropped out of school because the teachers wouldn't help me and I fell behind. It wasn't like I didn't try I was there during any free time I had to try and do the work but they just wouldn't help me. I have no friends, I don't ever leave the house unless it's to do weight training or to work at tesco 3 nights which I absolutely hate every time I am down there feels like an eternity even though my shifts are only 4hrs 15mins long I just don't know how some people can stand working there for like 10hr shifts everyday. I never talk to anyone down there and no one talks to me it's like I am invisible. All I do is watch films, use my PS2 and play internet games all day just to pass the time. Whats worse is that when I finally built up the courage to tell my mum that I wanted to die she said "Don't do that I've got enough problems as it is and anyway if anyone should be commiting suicide it should be me with all the problems I've got" and that was the end of our conversation. I couldn't believe it her son tells her that he wants to die and all she does is make the conversation about herself like she always does. I can't tell my dad because he'll just shout at me for feeling this way. I am always angry with the way my life is just to suppress it I punch walls until my knuckles begin to bleed and recently I have started cutting my upper arm with a razor blade. I know that I need help and have started talking to a therapist and in the last nearly 4 months I have had only 3 sessions with her which haven't help one bit. My life has no future or meaning and all I can think about is killing myself what am I to do?