...help me...

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Icey, Dec 29, 2009.

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  1. Icey

    Icey Active Member

    I know it's silly to want to kill myself over the death of a member of my favorite band but... I feel like it.

    I didn't feel like it before, but now... since that incident... I've wanted nothing but.

    Some stupid b*tch commented on the homage blog post my love posted in memory of him and completely mocked his death. I've already hated her because she's abusive to my friend Julie (Who's a brainless twat for staying with her anyways0. And now I just want to murder her. Of course she lives all the way in Mexico so I can't do a thing.

    But NO ONE disrespects the dead in my presence. Even if I've never heard of the person who passed on NO ONE disrespects the dead in front of me. These kids were running around in the graveyard stomping on graves while I was visiting my great grandma and I was near to breaking their skull open for being so stupid.


    And this chick did. To my favorite drummer in the world. Who's a part of my favorite band in the world. Which is my only means of escaping the world.

    I yelled at her. I screamed at her and called her obscenities and now I wish she were dead.

    But I don't wish her dead. I really don't.

    I wish I were dead instead.

    I wish I had the guts to kill myself right here and right now. Not only is my only means of hope gone, but it was also disrespected. And on top of that I'm wishing death on someone... and that's just not me. I never do that.

    I feel so helpless right now...

    I feel so confused right now..

    I just want to fucking die. I don't give a care. I just want to die. And it's all her fault for being so disrespectful... It's ALL her fault. But...

    I don't know.


    i just dont.

    ODIECOM Well-Known Member

    ok, at this point your bent out of shape.
    i dont know if that band member is someone you played with or a band on the radio. in either case you have to understand that the vast majority of the younger general public and a portion of the older public are jerks and they dont have respect for anything or anyone. is it irratating, sickining, enough to make you angery ? perhaps ... thing is ... as mad as it makes us sometimes .. we cant allow it to control us. your ready to kill yourself over all this ... what good would that do ? it would do no good. the general public isnt gunna change. i dont know how old you are but, at my age .. i can tell you ppl have gotten worse as the years have gone by. thats not gunna change either. WE have to change. so we dont allow others stupid disrespectful acts bring us down, we have to accept it for what it is.
    theirs stupid ppl in this world. you know the respect you have for that band member ... thats all that matters. let the others be them.
  3. Icey

    Icey Active Member

    Now that I've had a day to think about it, I guess you're right...

    I mean I'm still depressed over it but there's no use killing myself.

    ODIECOM Well-Known Member

    very good.
    you continue to move FORWARD.

    glad you made the choice.
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