every day my life just get worse, if you read my other thread you'll see my history, but to put it simple i had only one person who i could be with but now that person is dead, neither "friends" or family speak a word to me and i have to bear all the blame and responsabilities of others against my will and every day that pass on feels more painful to be alive, people were not made to be alone but i am, and it felt like i always was alone in first place is been a whole month since i could have a chat with another person, and they don't care at all, as if i'm just a burden, and i'm strarting to think they're right, i don't have anythinhg besides the internet to rely upon cuz i just don't think it's right for me to bear all this pain alone, what makes even worse, just recently i girl said she liked me, and that she wanted to go out with me, i thought that it was a light to keep on livin' but it turned out to be a prank, she made a bet with her friends that i would come see her, and after i went to the meeting place like a fool i just to be the laughingstock of the girls, and, still i'm gettin bullied, since i have a short temper i just beat out some of the bullies, but i was suspended at school, got extra work at summerbreak , my parents just didn't care, neither want to hear a word from me, and now i'm being avoided by the whole school... it made me depressed again, i just can't handle anymore and i'm planning to do it today, but somehow, i still have this will to live on, the only thinhg that kept me alive till today, i'm starting to lose this will and i went here to see if i could find some light to keep me going on