Help my self harm is getting worse

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by bitheway, Jan 28, 2008.

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  1. bitheway

    bitheway Member

    Hi i remember telling myself this past summer that i will never cut my wrists, but here i am looking at my scarred wrists. I dont know how it got go this point. I recently stopped cutting for 7 weeks and it was the hardest 7 weeks to endure. I had a headache and panic attacks and flashbacks. The only thing that helps me get out of the panic attacks and flashbacks is cutting. I cant seem to help it. Sometimes i dont even realize im cutting until i look at my wrist and see the blood or look at my hand and see the bloody razor. I am mad at myself for doing it yet i believe that i deserve it all.

    I really need my blade right now and i wish someone would just help me. I know it might be too much to ask because this is just someone talking through a computer to seek help...but i do have professional help with my therapist every tuesday. Im just too scared to tell her or show her my cuts even though she knows that i cut.

    Does anyone have any advice or anything? Please i need replies. Cause right now i am trying to find a blade so i can continue cutting...god i have gotten so addicted its not even funny....please help
     
  2. Dreamer uk

    Dreamer uk Well-Known Member

    Hi

    I don't think I can be of much comfort to you but I just thought I'd post to let you know NOT to cut yourself.

    You might think you deserve to suffer pain but in reality you don't.

    I presume it must make you feel better in some way, that you have been punished by hurting yourself, and I feel similar sometimes only I don't self-harm.

    Try to think positive things and hold onto some hope for the future.

    I don't know what you're going through really so am not much help, I just thought I'd send you my best wishes.

    Take care


    Mark
     
  3. bitheway

    bitheway Member

    thanks mark...

    I wish i read the reply sooner, cause i had already cut when i read it....sorry
     
  4. thedeafmusician

    thedeafmusician Staff Alumni

    Before even THINKING about stopping cutting, the first things to do are to figure out WHY it is that you cut, and then after you've done that, think of something that you can do - that is constructive - instead of cutting. Because cutting is an addiction, you can't really stop it just like that. You need to replace it with something else. Good luck, and stay safe. :arms:

    TDM
     
  5. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    Hi bitheway. Please, the next time you realize that you have a razorblade in your hand, tell yourself to put it down and go do something else. Like any compulsive behaviour, like gambling, cutting can be very hard to stop. But it is possible. It just takes a lot of will power and conscious effort on your part. I know you can do it hun.
     
  6. Anime-Zodiac

    Anime-Zodiac Well-Known Member

    The next time you get the impulse to cut, do something instead to occupy your mind. Like a hobby or some sort of activity like: Listening to music, playing computer games, going for walks, writing, reading a book, etc.

    The feeling will disappear in time, you just have to see it through.
     
  7. Crying All Time

    Crying All Time Well-Known Member

    Next time you want to cut try to do something else, for example, wash your laundry, or do the dishes ...
     
  8. netsirk

    netsirk Active Member

    I can identify with you on this. I go through periods of not cutting only to go back to cutting and then it is worse. I do believe cutting is an addiction just like drugs or drinking. I use cutting to numb the inner pain like a person would use drinking to numb their pain. If you are able you should open up to your counselor as hard as that is it would give you a person with whom you are accountable and someone who could help you get through 7 weeks and more without cutting. I have found that one thing that does help me is to write. I write letters to no one just write to get out what is paining me so much inside. Sometimes I write to a person tht I can trust or in a journal. Even if you never send the letter it helps to get it out in the open and then it is not stuffed inside leading you to cut.


    If you ever need to talk to someone you can pm me as I check this site a lot during each day and night. I will get back to you.
     
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