Help Needed - Nervous Breakdown

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Screaminginsilence, Oct 15, 2011.

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  1. Screaminginsilence

    Screaminginsilence Well-Known Member

    I havent been here in a long time and i dread to read through my past posts, i appreciate this may result in lower replies but if anyone is reading this i really need some help at the moment.

    My mum has been in bristol mental hospital and recently moved to a local mental hospital suffering signs of psychosis/nervous breakdown.

    She is incoherant, forgetful, on tuesday she was very aggressive, screaming, afraid, not sleeping at all, doesnt remember who we are, keeps talking about having a secret.

    I cant get her to have a wash or go to the toilet, its been nearly a week.

    She is in hospital so we can sleep and rest as we werent coping at home but i dont know what to do

    I have manic depression and have suffered for 10 years now, i take 60mg fluoxetine every day and live a pretty steady life. I feel the need to back away from my mum to prevent this from setting somthing off in my mind because if im totally honest i just dont know what to do.

    Ive been pretty strong holding my dad up, stronger than i thought i was but i feel close to break point now

    Has anyone been in this situation before? Please post if you have, none of my friends understand - they think my mums just stressed but its beyond that, far beyond and im seriously concerned for everyone and just dont know what to do
  2. jimk

    jimk Staff Alumni

    Hello Screaming.. do your mom's docs have any idea what is causing this for her??? this sounds very serious .. i would keep in touch with her docs so yo uknow how this is going.. also hope your dad can hang in there and is ok..

    also remember to keep taking meds and look after yourself best you can thru this all. best wishes.. Jim
  3. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    Hiya. That's a lot to have on your plate. I'm sorry to hear that you're having hard times in your family. :hug: You have been very strong and kudos to you for that!

    You said you're holding up your dad. Is he there for you? It would be good if you and your dad could be there for "each other." Maybe you can talk to him and tell him that the situation and worry about your mum is beginning to affect your own state of mind.

    Does the hospital offer any family support through social services? Perhaps you could get some help that way so it's not all on your shoulders.

    And we'll be here for you, too. Please take care of yourself, OK? :hug:
  4. Screaminginsilence

    Screaminginsilence Well-Known Member

    Im p*ssed off - we have been offered no help of advice from any of the nhs services, just doctors for my mum and medication for her

    Me and my dad live 70 miles apart so we are there for each other as much as we can be. im driving up again tomorrow but im ready to start screaming as im so frustrated with everything

    I visited my mum on my own on friday and was there for 4 hours, by the end we sat in silence as i didnt have the mental strength to keep repeating myself after she forgot everything i said

    The doctors are concerned, my mum was (i think) a high level manager within the NHS who was under stress for a very long time and just cracked. No history or depression or anything like it - no physical illnesses, nothing.

    One day shes just cracked and lost her mind, she was as strong as an ox and we never ever saw eye to eye - if im honest at times i hate her and i found myself wishing she was dead when we sat in A&E at 5am on Wednesday morning

    Im taking my tablets and i feel ok but im worried i could flip like my mum has done and have no one to talk to thats been in this situation before so dont know what to do or expect :(
  5. Screaminginsilence

    Screaminginsilence Well-Known Member

    and thanks for replying, its nice to know im not alone and there are people reading my posts through the void that is the internet x
  6. BeautifullyChaotic

    BeautifullyChaotic Well-Known Member

    Hello, I can actually relate. When I was a kid my mother was ill a lot of the time. She suffers from a few mental illnesses and her breakdowns were torture for me. I can remember as a teenager, taking care of her and my sister, while trying to keep the truth hidden from my father because my sister was not his child, and I didn't want to be separated from her.
    We couldn't have mother committed because if she was I would be sent to live with my dad and my sister into foster care. So it was a struggle. It was hell trying to get her to bathe, eat, use the bathroom and even change her clothes. On top of that I had school and a little sister to care for.
    You are lucky to be able to get her some professional help, but you should also think about joining a support group, for families coping with mental illness. And I'm here, if you want to talk.
  7. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    It's got to be scary to see your mum in that shape. However, just because she eventually was overstressed to that point does NOT mean it will happen to you. You are different people. :hug:

    Have you been in touch with your own therapist/pdoc/GP? Maybe get some extra support from him/her/them in your home town - even if it's just to talk to someone who understands on a regular basis until things settle for your mum and your family as a whole.
  8. Screaminginsilence

    Screaminginsilence Well-Known Member

    I just dont understand, she thinks its a game and that we are playing mind games. She refused to take medication on the hospital and kept wanting to leave so the doctor said they may have to consider sectioning her

    She will take meds (Diazapam and an anti-psychotic, i cant remember the name) from my dad but then the pressure is on him to be there 24/7

    Me and my boyf have split and im in the process of buying a flat (5 weeks in, just leaving the solicitors to it at the moment) so its hard as i want him to cuddle me but he is reluctant to

    I fought hard to move back to wales to be with him but things didnt work out and im back to being on my own again with this added shit.

    I can feel it pushing and pushing me and i dont want to crack :'(
  9. BeautifullyChaotic

    BeautifullyChaotic Well-Known Member

    Mental breaks are hard to understand, even for the professionals. It's different with every person that goes through it but the best way to put it is, she's right now living in an alternate reality. Her mind is telling her one thing, everyone else telling her something else and it's a very confusing state to be in.

    We each want to be able to trust our own mind, so imagine the stress and confusion of being told what you see, hear and feel and believe to be true is wrong. It's a long road to recovery, and as you embark down it you MUST take time for YOU. If you don't you will be stressed and worried all the time.

    Don't worry about having a mental break yourself, you seem so very strong, and you have your father helping as well.

    She very well may need to be committed into a longer term care facility, because there are things that you and your father are not equip to handle and there is no shame in that. Yes, take care of her as best you can, but also remember to live your own life as well.
  10. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    You have more on your plate than I realized at first. I'm not surprised you're feeling stretched thin right now. :arms:

    It does seem like your mum wants your dad there all the time. As I read your post, it occurred to me that she might very well be scared herself and is looking to your dad as her usual pillar of strength.

    I'm sorry to hear about the split with your bf. That's unfortunate given the situation.

    But, congrats on buying a flat! That's positive news. :)

    You said your friends don't seem to understand. Could you talk to one of them about how bad this "really is" for you and that you wish people understood better? Just clear the air a bit and hopefully get more support? :dunno:

    Do get in touch with your own mental health professionals. Let them know you need more support from them for a while. And keep posting here. We're always ready to listen and we care. :hug:
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