I, just like the tile i’m gonna go straight into this. I’m on a major low right now, and, I don’t know what to do.
I keep having major emotional attacks. And it feels like I’m being possessed. Like, it’s not me. And they just suddenly hit me, like a hammer to the face. And for no reason!
Although I do have ALOT of problems in my life, I believe I am a strong person, and my favorite saying is "every thing will be alright in the end. If it's not alright, it’s not the end." and I’m being VERY patient, and waiting for the storm to f****** go away.
The thing is, I’ve had so many of these "mood swings of depression" and.... I’m just so scared.... I really don't think I want to die. But, when ever this.... thing grabs be, I just want to give up on every thing. And be left alone, from every thing. All emotion. Every thing. Because, when it comes on, (and saying this sounds weird, because it’s some thing above physical and emotional) your in so much pain, you can't move. You crumple up, into this pathetic heap on the floor, grabbing at any thing that might help you stand up again.
The worst one lasted 13 hours once. That was bad. I thought I’d never get out of it. Samaritans basically blanked me. Basically saying, well what do you want ME to do? I was only on the phone 7 minutes.
It’s so horrid, painful, and degrading, you want to just, escape.
But when I come out of it. I have a laugh with some people I know. And, I feel happy some times. And that’s what makes me feel so stupid.
I tried antidepressants. They did not work.
I don’t know what to do any more. I’m so scared I’ll... do some thing I’ll regret. I’m so scared I’ll have another attack, I don’t think I could face another one....
If any one can give any advice, any advice at all!!! I’d be extremely grateful!
...if it’s just to numb you from every thing... any thing.... please. I’m begging
I keep having major emotional attacks. And it feels like I’m being possessed. Like, it’s not me. And they just suddenly hit me, like a hammer to the face. And for no reason!
Although I do have ALOT of problems in my life, I believe I am a strong person, and my favorite saying is "every thing will be alright in the end. If it's not alright, it’s not the end." and I’m being VERY patient, and waiting for the storm to f****** go away.
The thing is, I’ve had so many of these "mood swings of depression" and.... I’m just so scared.... I really don't think I want to die. But, when ever this.... thing grabs be, I just want to give up on every thing. And be left alone, from every thing. All emotion. Every thing. Because, when it comes on, (and saying this sounds weird, because it’s some thing above physical and emotional) your in so much pain, you can't move. You crumple up, into this pathetic heap on the floor, grabbing at any thing that might help you stand up again.
The worst one lasted 13 hours once. That was bad. I thought I’d never get out of it. Samaritans basically blanked me. Basically saying, well what do you want ME to do? I was only on the phone 7 minutes.
It’s so horrid, painful, and degrading, you want to just, escape.
But when I come out of it. I have a laugh with some people I know. And, I feel happy some times. And that’s what makes me feel so stupid.
I tried antidepressants. They did not work.
I don’t know what to do any more. I’m so scared I’ll... do some thing I’ll regret. I’m so scared I’ll have another attack, I don’t think I could face another one....
If any one can give any advice, any advice at all!!! I’d be extremely grateful!
...if it’s just to numb you from every thing... any thing.... please. I’m begging
Last edited by a moderator: