HELP!! Senior year, and everything's going wrong.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by AliceUnderground, May 1, 2012.

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  1. I'm a senior in college, or I'm supposed to be. But several times this semester I missed my weight lifting class because I had no energy to get up in the morning (I have severe depression). And they won't allow me to transfer in an extra .25 credits this summer. So basically I'm likely not going to get my degree because of a stupid technicality. I hate school and I just want it to be over with, but now it won't be. I feel like I've let down my parents who have forked out 50 grand a year for the last 4 years. And the school officials and my weight training teacher are treating me like an unfavorable number they have to plug into their system: the way they're handling it is to "see what they can do" without "jeopardizing the integrity of the course". I just want to stop feeling so miserable and for all of this to be over with, and right now there seems to be only one solution that will provide this. But there's joy in life, too: I have a supportive fiance and some of the happiest moments of my life have been with him, even though I've only known him for the past year and a half, during which I've been depressed, which says something about what a wonderful guy he is. So I don't want my life to end, not really, but the past day or so things have been so horrible I've begun to doubt that they'll ever look up again. So I've come here looking for support, understanding, and advice on how to keep going even when doing so seems futile.
     
  2. Please. Someone. Give me some advice. I'm so close to giving up.
     
  3. MisterBGone

    MisterBGone Well-Known Member

    Well, although I know that it is difficult to do so right now, it would be wise to look at the big picture here... You're basically finished with your degree: CONGRATULATIONS On That!! So now, if you cannot make up this p.e. course over the summer, then you'll just have to come back in the fall--or as soon as you can--to complete it! No big thing.. I know it FEELS like it is, because you were expecting to graduate right now, but look, life throws us change-ups every now and then and it is up to us to respond to them. We've got to be able to adapt and be flexible to the given situation and adjust to the new circumstances. It is, after all, something of a miracle that you've managed to get through school at such an early age--given your depression. Many people with this disease do not even finish at all (in fact, many people with out depression fail to finish!). So, I know it's hard not to live in the moment, but when you look back on this, you'll see that it was barely a minor blip on the radar screen for your life and it's path. Trust Me!
     
  4. MisterBGone

    MisterBGone Well-Known Member

    ...and in case you're wondering, "what the heck does this idiot know?" ;) I got to the end of my senior year in college, with three courses - all electives within my major - to graduate (I registered only for classes outside of my major this entire year!). I then spent the next FIVE YEARS finishing those final 10 credits! So, yes, Depression does happen, and it's how you respond to it that may make the biggest difference in terms of the overall outcome... I was afraid to finish, grow up, become an ad-ult & decide what I was going to do for the rest of my life--that is, WHO I was going to become..
     
  5. StevenSiew

    StevenSiew Well-Known Member

    If you are happy in life then you should be happy and don't let the school thing brings you down. Find out from the school the quickest option to complete your degree and move on in life. Why do you need the school degree in the first place? Usually that is to enable you to find employment. Do you intent to further your education past high school? These are choices which you have to make in your life.
     
  6. I just want to get out into the working world. I don't care whether I'm making drinks at a bar, taking orders in a restaurant, working as a receptionist, or as a scientist in a water treatment plant. I love working, it makes me feel good, like I'm making a contribution to society. At school, I just feel miserable. I love learning new things, it's just that I don't function very well in the school system. I dunno. I just want this chapter of my life to be over with already so I can move on to something more fulfilling, but it's starting to look like I'll never escape it.
     
  7. ride26

    ride26 Member

    You need to change this type of thinking RIGHT NOW. Even after you enter the working world you will have the desire to "end this chapter of my life and move on to something more fulfilling". This type of thinking will never end, trust me. You need to work on making yourself happy regardless if your circumstances, which in contrast to me seem pretty damn good. You are almost done with school, paid for by your parents and you have a fiance. If you are feeling depressed, then it is likely a chemical imbalance. Go seek medical help.
     
  8. Yeah, I'm on medication. But it doesn't fix everything. And if I could change that type of thinking on the turn of a dime, I would have done so LONG ago. I don't want to feel miserable.
     
  9. Sorry, ride26, I didn't mean to snap at you. I've just been through a lot of shit in the past 24 hours. If you have any advice on how to make my chemicals more balanced - in addition to taking medicine, cause I'm already doing that - I would be grateful. I know you're just trying to help, and I appreciate that.
     
  10. tearsallday

    tearsallday Account Closed

    I know EXACTLY how you feel. I had a class that I was pulled out of the second half of... I was a month from graduating... a FREAKIN' MONTH!!! from completing my degree and now I have to go back in the fall semester to finish... I'm still a little peeved about it, so I know how you feel...more or less. I have come to the realization though... that there has to be a reason that I will graduate in December... Just hope I can live until then to find out... Best of luck and feel free to message.
     
  11. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    Hmm.. well schools will do that. Can you take one or two classes over the summer to finish out your major so you can graduate?
     
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