I feel as if I am about to break. Had a panic episode where my heartbeat just started to go fast, I started to feel pains in my stomach and I went very cold. I feel utterly miserable, I feel like I'm trapped in a box and theres no way to get out. I'm so tired of going through the motions, day after day, endless days. My life has no point right now, and that's fine because there isn't always a point to life. But right now I wish I had something other than guilt to keep me alive. My nightmares are coming back, that's when I know that there is something troubling me. I'm sick of being humiliated, being ditched because of my problems and feeling like everyone thinks I'm an attention seeker. I feel so lonely and tired, so sick of living a life where I fear nobody will ever like me. As a friend or more. I seen to either repulse or irritate people, especially lately. I feel like I've had a knife put through my heart because I was ditched a couple months ago. I can't talk to anyone in my family anymore now, they all have their own problems. The therapist I am supposed to be seeing I've met once, and I don't think it will help me much. I know why I am like this, I'm self aware enough to know that, but at the same time I can't control the emotions. I keep getting so angry for no decent reason, so sad and happy, I was hysterical moments before out of laughter, now I'm just depressed. I don't know what the point of this thread is, help I guess is needed. I've already taken some stuff, it won't kill me though, but I think I'm reacting to it because I'm feeling sick. Anyone got any advice? ;( Sorry that I ask for help/advice so often.