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Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Josephine, Oct 16, 2016.

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  1. Josephine

    Josephine Member

    I posted in the welcome forum too. Not sure how this works but I'm desperate for a response tonight. I'm so tired. I feel so done. I'm a fraud and I hate myself. Ive never joined a forum like this or shared things about myself anonymously online. This feels foreign and strange to me, but I'm getting to a place where I know I need help and to reach out. I look like everything is fine on the outside. I have so much to thankful for and i hate myself for feeling this way. Have a great job, friends, family, apartment- I am dying inside. I hurt so much. It is painful for me to wake up and getting out of bed is painful every day. I can't do the littlest things. I seem so social and friendly and then collapse at home and can't function. It's like I'm sleepwalking through everything but seem so engaged and vibrant. I detest myself. I'm so tired all the time. I feel so alone. I have hearing loss and tinnitus and when I'm stressed out my ears ring louder and louder. Right now they're deafening. The hearing loss makes me feel even more separate and I can't keep up with conversation. I feel lost. I just want to go to sleep and keep sleeping. I have a giant project due for work tomorrow and I've tried all day to start and can't do it. I'm so lazy and worthless and just feel completely hopeless. My body hurts tonight and I just want to go to sleep and give up. Help.
  2. Rockclimbinggirl

    Rockclimbinggirl SF climber Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Welcome to the forum. Are you getting any professinal help right now? I am sorry to hear that you have hearing problems.
  3. Surfer1333

    Surfer1333 New Member

    Hi, I feel ya, I'm not sure how to respond or what to say, I've never been to a site like this before, to me it also feels quite foreign. I am here to talk if you want to. I feel like I'm in a similar situation, I hate getting home everyday after work, I breakdown, I slept till four today, I also feel tired all the time , I hate being alone it gives me panick attacks. I hate getting up, I was four hours late to work twice last week and I feel pathetic, The things I've found that helps a little is find someone to talk to and tell them everything that's on your mind, and pray, I'm sorry your feeling the way that you are, its not your fault. I just want you too feel loved and I hope this helps.
  4. Unknown_111

    Unknown_111 Forum Buddy Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Welcome to the forum and SF FAMILY.
  5. Lilith3372

    Lilith3372 Member

    Your fatique..pains.. can be a symptom of some disorder. It is not normal. Take care of you and go to your GP. Talk to him. You should never neglect your mental health. For how long have you been experiencing these symptoms????
  6. I have a crushing tinnitus as well and really feel your pain. It is really a severe condition with depression and stress, as the ringing just gets louder and louder. I try to sleep to sounds of rain or waterfalls on youtube videos, and that helps to mask the ringing sounds. Hope that helps a bit.
    Unknown_111 likes this.
  7. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    It sounds like work-related stress is making your problems worse. Is there a way for you to make some changes at work that will lower your stress/work load? If not, it may be helpful/necessary to leave your job.

    Cutting back on your level of social activities could help too.

    There are some dietary and other recommendations that I could make based on the perspective of traditional chinese medicine, but I don't want to offer that unless you are interested.
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