I have to die for sure. No one is here to care or support me, my whole family neglects me, even if it is my fault I need it to survive. I'm 19 so I should be able to buy a gun? Maybe its law not to sell me one though cause I have mental health problems in my records. The mental health place I go to here is a fucking joke. I don't trust them at all any more, therapists, psycholo's, counselors, they are all do desensitized its like they think of their patients as nothing, no personal care or connection. Why do I even need to go see some weird bitch thats going to just spew more typical fake advice at me. I Know I should finish school, get my license, get laid, get job etcetera. Telling me to do it over and over isn't helping. I need some real support. or maybe I'm just a defective human and will never be able to do any thing useful. All I truly want is a quick death. sorry if this is double post, not sure if other one got through.