Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by Darkest*Midnight*, Dec 16, 2007.

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  1. I had just found my place...
    The little niche of High School society I thought I fit in.
    I was happy! And then.....
    The situations at home started declining,
    I started getting worse,
    I started to turn away from everything I had begun to love,
    My grades started to drop,
    I started sleeping less and less,
    I started eating less, and telling my friends I'd already eaten,
    And then we went to the doctor,
    and found out that I was loosing my eyesight...
    To optical neuritis,
    And I got scared.
    And even though it was getting better because of my medicine,
    I got even more frightened....
    And my old nightmares began to reccuring,
    And then.....
    Monday night.....
    I reffered back to a chapter in my life I thought I had left behind.
    I hurt myself....And I'm even more frightened now. I feel like I'm loosing myself, the happiness I've longed for. I think I may actually be in trouble this time....

    What do I do?
  2. martijn

    martijn Active Member

    Counselling? Writing? Posting here?

    I'm not sure, really. Sorry to say, but I don't think I know the answer:unsure:
  3. __Rawr.Tigga

    __Rawr.Tigga Well-Known Member

    Heyy hun

    :hug: We're here for you ok? Can you tell us more? OPen up? If you want to talk privately honey then I'm here ok? Speak to us. We're all here for you :hug:

    Hand on in there ok? Keep control, Try not to hurt yourself. Read, write, listen to music, punch a pillow, do anything other than hurt yourself hun. Don't get into it again. Not if you were free, not if you amanaged to stop before.

    PM me if you want hun :hug:

    Take care and keep strong,
  4. jane doe

    jane doe Well-Known Member

    this is the first step to stop doing it after starting again. The reeason of why are you here it`s that you want help and that`s what we try to give. If you are having phisical problems it`s may be because you`re not eating and sleeping well. Try to relax, no matter how wrong things goes, if you had happiness, you`ll have it again. pm me or keep posting, it`s the best way to start helping yourself:)
  5. Thanks guys. Well, I'm trying to relax by every day, after school, going into a music room and playing one of the pianos, just composing. It's helping a bit, but after something that happened this morning, when My dad and I got into a fight, and he talked about shipping me off to a mental ward, or another psychiatrist. I'M SICK OF ALL THE DOCTORS!!! I'm sorry...It's just...I want out.
  6. The_Discarded

    The_Discarded Staff Alumni

    No sorries. You just want the ridiculousness to be over, is all. Can't blame you.

    Dear, you don't want to get into a pattern of hurting yourself all over again; it's such an atrocious process.

    You're doing well. The music and stuff? That's good. It's helping, so keep it up.

    I understand being sick of the doctors, and a lot of the time they don't do a damn thing. Obviously your dad has a lack of understanding. Not sure your age, but maybe you'll be able to move out soon? And you can pursue your interests on your own without the intervention of people who couldn't get it if they wanted to.

    Stuff'll fall into place. The years will pass. You aren't alone. Breathe deeply and hang on.

    A PM away if you need to talk :hug:
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 20, 2007
  7. Thank you so much. I've been doing better, though christmas was slightly painful, I'm doing better, and things are falling into place a little more. I'll be moving out in a year, seeing as I'm halfway through junior year. But I'm fine now.

    Thank you so much.
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