I just do not know what to do anymore! I just found out that colleges in Japan will not accept stupid people who are currently in special ed in a trashy public school like me... I am starting high school in a few days, I have 4 years before college, but I am not going to a private high school, so I will not even have the slightest chance of having a life in Tokyo, so, either I am going to kill myself after a few years, and I still cannot find a way to live in Tokyo, or if I have to stay in this stupid A$#%@%# (Evil US), then I will just have to start taking a combination of drugs, to escape reality, while picturing myself in Japan, I really do not know what to do anymore, I hate the US, and I want to escape this nightmare, but I just do not know what to do!!! Should I start taking drugs if things do not go my way, or commit suicide, or is there a way to accomplish my dream???