Well, my name is Craig and I'm 37. I live in California and I was working as a Video Editor for five years before I got laid-off in May. I'm also a writer and an actor. I'm not produced or published, although I've written lots of screenplays and some books. I've also been writing comedy sketches. I've been depressed for a very long time. It's not just about losing the job (I hated my boss and wasn't sorry to be rid of him). I always feel unwanted and unloved, and am constantly trying to be funny in public because I feel as if people will only accept me if I am entertaining them. I have some friends that I like, but they have their own lives and their own problems to deal with. Many days and nights, I can never get anyone on the phone. I think about dying alot, although I don't particularly want to be dead. When I close my eyes at night, I see guns firing at me. I'd like to get my work published or produced someday, but I can't even get any of my friends to read my stuff. It's been difficult for me to look for work because I feel unfocused and distracted all the time. With each passing day (getting closer and closer to when my unemployment is cut off), I feel more and more distracted. Some mornings, I just don't want to get up. I wish I could talk to a doctor, but I don't have any money. I do have good moments and good days, but it's getting tougher and tougher to find them. I feel like a failure and that I've let everybody down. I feel like I'm causing my family and friends pain because they're always worried about me. And, as you may have guessed, I'm single with no girlfriend. My life feels empty to me. Can someone talk to me?