Here Is What I'm Doing To Save My Life

Discussion in 'Positive Feelings and Motivational Messages' started by Michael Ayin, Jun 26, 2010.

  1. Michael Ayin

    Michael Ayin Well-Known Member

    I have given thought about the army for months. I have a large background in cooking, have the degree, and although I have a job I don't care for it much. I have felt futureless for far too long and the benefits of routine will come as a blessing to me.

    Every relative I've talked to that enlisted has come out more empowered, more self-reliant than before. I'm in okay physical condition, and although I'm sure I won't like bootcamp, that's a blip on the radar screen compared to the rest of it. My health will improve. A drill sargeant yelling at me doesn't not intimidate at all.

    This is to make me stronger in every way, and get out of his shithole I live. I'm tried for months to get another job---I've had offers with little money, however. This will (at least) give me the security I need and after a couple of years, I will decide whether or not I want to re-enlist.

    The economy is still shit despite the fact I have a job. I don't want to be a doomsayer, but I fear that it will be a long time before it recovers. Plus, after much investigation I think this will bring a positive change for me.

    My sister says that her survival instinct kicked in after being there, and she was a drug addict and penniless before she enlisted. She's transformed. I want that, too. I'm not the most patriotic person, but I'm still a fighter. I don't want to be too old, broken, and no job prospects or hope at the end of my existence. That would really make me do myself in.

    I'm longing for a new lease on life, and I think this is NEEDED, not just wanted. Out for now.
  2. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    It sounds like you are taking responsibility for your situation big time and I admire you for that tremendously takes effort and great self reflection to look at your situation and make needed changes.
    I hope the military is for you and helps bring about some, or all, of the change you are looking for in your life..if you need a pen pal while in count me in I would be happy to keep supporting you.
  3. Things

    Things Well-Known Member

    I've had relatives who've enlisted in the army too. I think having a sense of purpose will help you.

    Just know that it's going to be very, very difficult, but I'm sure you're well aware of that already.
  4. Michael Ayin

    Michael Ayin Well-Known Member

    You're right about it not going to be easy, especially at first. I'm not in bad shape, but the physical part does make me wonder if I will make it. Probably. My own sister wasn't in the best of health when she joined, and made it through pretty good and has benefited from it up to now.

    Perhaps the more important part is the mental aspect, although they will help with that greatly. I honestly think it's something I need. I feel like I going no where with my life and without it there is every indication I will be stuck here for a very long time. That alone bothers me to the point where I have to act.
  5. Mikeintx

    Mikeintx Well-Known Member

    Good luck, I think it is a good decision. Start the physical training now, try to beat the basic entry requirements.
  6. Michael Ayin

    Michael Ayin Well-Known Member

    I sprained my knee jogging, but that's what I'm doing early---I'm also going to ask the recruiters exactly what I should be doing outside of my regular workouts (I lift and do submission fighting, but I want to go something specific for PT).
  7. Michael Ayin

    Michael Ayin Well-Known Member

    You know, one of the biggest things is that I really need something to look forward to in my life and a sense of belonging and purpose. I really wish I could just be mundane like certain people---there are individuals out there that all they look forward to is partying and getting off of work. I wish I could be like that, but I'm not.

    Note that I'm not trying to save the world or defend the Constitution or anything here. Ultimately, this is for me in the long run. I don't know if I'm going to make it a career choice or a bridge to get out of my situation for several years. If I'm in there for a few years and I don't like what is happening in the private sector it could be a motivator. I've known about people who stayed until retirement because they were actually USED to the lifestyle and others were seeing how bad it was in their old towns---there was no future where they used to live.

    I have thought about this for months. I'm not someone who jumps ship easily, and realize that even if I never get deployed I will make this as a commitment. I have no kids. No wife or girlfriend. No mortage. My debt is low. And once I'm loyal to something I will not quit. I worked at my last job like a cyborg, almost never was late, never called in sick, always paid need to the boss over me.

    I'm surprised my new job doesn't take advantage of this, but they don't. I'm not doing this out of desperation, although I'm in my 30s now and the time table is set. Plus, I can't possibly see myself here for many years where I live. Michigan sucks, the economy sucks, and I feel like I live in a deadzone.

    Chances are good that I'll end up being a cafeteria cook before trying to move up over time, but that doesn't bother me much. I miss fine dining, but I'm serving fast food now anyway. I would take more pride in serving in the military than this corporate crap I'm doing now, and certainly won't get laid off.
  8. Michael Ayin

    Michael Ayin Well-Known Member

    This Wednesday I'm going to see another recruiter, and although I probably will not sign just yet, I will get tips on the AVSAB (I took the pre-AVSAB and did okay) and about bootcamp and PT. I already know what I'm going in for MOS-wise, so I do have much idea of my direction.

    I can't see myself in Michigan dead broke, old, and listless like The Wrestler (good flick). I'm more fearful of that than just about anything else.
  9. Michael Ayin

    Michael Ayin Well-Known Member

    I wanted to thank you for your confidence in me. What I'm doing is one of the most difficult decisions of my life. Not because of military boot camp or the possible tedious routine of the army. It's because I'm leaving all my loved ones behind---again.

    The place and job where I live are total dead ends.

    I've tried to move again and get another job, but have had little luck with responses. This economy is terrible, but that's only one of many reasons I'm going in. Some might think it is too hard for them or what find the restricted freedoms (staying with 50 miles of the base, getting up for PT in the morning) limiting, but it's one of few things giving me hope.

    There is one thing, but it is something I can't control. No matter how long I stay in my father will die at some point. I can't live the way I am now, but I don't know I will ever say goodbye to him before he passes away or not. This is gutwrenching. I will have the ability to see him if he's in trouble or finally succumbs, but it still bother me. He cannot support me in any fashion, and I can't prevent eventually what is going to happen. I'm already preparing myself by spending some more time before I leave for good, because you never know.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 1, 2010
  10. Dave_N

    Dave_N Banned Member

    Good luck on your choice to join the army Michael. I think that it's a step in the right direction, because it will give you more strength and self-confidence, plus you will be trained in how to accurately fire a machine gun. :wink:

    If you get deployed to Afghanistan, you'll have to be prepared to shoot and kill your enemies. Many soldiers return home after serving in the army, but they suffer from PTSD (shell shock), and have a difficult time re-integrating into society. A good soldier must be able to kill on demand and not be emotionally affected by your actions. Can you handle that?
  11. Young suicider

    Young suicider Well-Known Member

    Virtual high five for you!!

    Good luck I hope it works out how you want it to.