He's pushing me away...

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by nararabbit, Oct 29, 2014.

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  1. nararabbit

    nararabbit Active Member

    Ever since my hospitalization our/my therapist has been trying to get my husband to take on more responsibility at home to take the pressure off me. He's normally a super sweet and caring guy, but now he's pushing me away, won't cuddle, doesn't want to talk, and is only half-assing his way through his "homework" like he doesn't even care. It's a hugely radical change in only a few weeks.

    I loved him to death, the thought that our marriage might be ruined because of my being weak is horrible. He was the first guy I trusted and I don't want to start over at 31. If I was gone he could be happy and move on with his life. He wouldn't have to remind me to take my meds, do the majority of the chores, put up with my neediness... I feel like a terrible wife who just needs to grow up and can't. :apologetic:
     
  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hi there,

    I think talking is the key issue here, why is he behaving like that? No cuddling etc.. Have you confronted him about it? I take it from your post that ye are in relationship counselling and by the sounds of it it's doing the opposite to what you need. You're not terrible and don't need to grow up. You need more communication, more love..if you feel you have tried everything then maybe it is for the best to split up and at 31 you CAN move on, 31 is young. I understand about the trust issues but please do not do anything you will later regret. Like I said communication is key, in my opinion of this situation. Here's a :hug: from me :)
     
  3. Butterfly

    Butterfly Pokémon Master Staff Alumni SF Author SF Supporter

    Perhaps he is finding it all a little overwhelming and finding it hard to deal with. Have you stopped to ask him if he is okay? Maybe he is feeling a little depressed himself.
     
  4. nararabbit

    nararabbit Active Member

    Butterfly, he also has depression. He is job hunting right now and is having a hard time dealing with the rejection. My therapist advised I listen when he talks but otherwise let him alone, maybe he just needs to process stuff on his own and the more I cling and worry I will just push him farther away.

    She was able to talk me down today which is good. I still feel like a bad wife however.
     
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