Hey Sf

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by ASkylitDrive, Jun 9, 2010.

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  1. ASkylitDrive

    ASkylitDrive Well-Known Member

    Well, for once I have good news. I spent two hours thinking. In the truck, with my dad with me. I slowly came to the realization of alot of things.

    1) My dad needs me. He is trying to finally start a family. A girlfriend, with kids who need a father as much as I need a mother. Me and him, we've been through hell. An abusive girlfriend before Dee Dee, my mother and her abuse, his fighting for custody for me, my mom's drugs...ect. He needs me. I've never noticed this before.

    2) I am the structure for my friends. They need me as much as him. I didn't notice how much I helped a friend of mine by just holding him and telling him its okay. I didn't know I had such an impact. I need to be there for them.

    So, I decided this in the truck. I'm calling off my suicide 'date'. I'm calling off all attempts. I'm calling off pills, cutting, harming..punching myself. Downgrades and all of my episodes. I'm making them stop.

    Its going to be hard, I can already tell the urges will get strong. The only thing I can honestly ask for is support right now. This is a really big and important and hard decision for me.
  2. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    Shelbi, i love you.

    I got a bit choked up reading that. You have no idea how rediculously proud i am of you. You are a massive inspiration.

    You know i will support you as much as i can through this. No matter what.

    This has made my day.
  3. ASkylitDrive

    ASkylitDrive Well-Known Member

    Bec hun..thanks so much.
    You've helped alot. I love you.

    Don't ever leave.
  4. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    I won't. Promise.

  5. ASkylitDrive

    ASkylitDrive Well-Known Member

    Heh. Yay. *blush*
  6. Viro

    Viro Well-Known Member

    I'm glad you decided to call it off
  7. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    that's really good news....I'm glad you had that revelation......*hugs*
  8. ASkylitDrive

    ASkylitDrive Well-Known Member

    :) Thanks guys

    Its gunna be rough But others have done it..I need to try.
    Like I told Lynn, if I just baby it I wont ever quit
  9. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    Absolutely. But i have faith that you'll make it through.
  10. ASkylitDrive

    ASkylitDrive Well-Known Member

  11. Mikeintx

    Mikeintx Well-Known Member

  12. Dubstepper

    Dubstepper Staff Alumni

    never thought i would be able to breathe a sigh of relief...

    im proud of you, little sis. takes a lot to fight thru it all.. it really does.

    do this, live life with that inspiring attitude. never ever forget who you are supporting, emotionally. even though some of us are strong, we depend on those who are going to be stronger than us to get us through to the next week....

    make it happen, dont give up. im always here even if im not always here. you know i care.

    you know WE care. Love you, sis
  13. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    I'm glad you've changed your mind. I think you need to make sure to keep this thread a positive one so that when things get difficult and you're struggling, you can come back to it and read what you've written.
  14. ASkylitDrive

    ASkylitDrive Well-Known Member

    I am. I have this thread bookmarked. Reading it over again with a fresher mind (I was tired yesterday) is making me tear up.

    Just all the nice things I'm getting. I've never had people proud of me like this.

  15. Lone_walker

    Lone_walker Well-Known Member

    Hey Shelbi =D
    I'm not surprised you have so many people saying how proud of you they are, I am too =)
    Its a big step to take, but i'm 110% positive you'll pull through, you're an awesome person and more!! BIG hug =D :hug:
  16. ASkylitDrive

    ASkylitDrive Well-Known Member

    Thanks alot Darren :hug: :hug: :hug:
  17. Perfect Melancholy

    Perfect Melancholy SF Friend

    That is really awesome, you have done nothing but be supportive of me since I have been here, and done a lot to try and help me I am so glad you are trying :love::nice::hug::hiya:
  18. ASkylitDrive

    ASkylitDrive Well-Known Member

    :stars: Rich you know I'm always here for you lol
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