Hey...I had a breakdown at work yesterday (privately in bathroom)and overslept today so I called out sick.. (Against the 2 hours notice policy).I'm panicking about being fired.. this crummy call centre job is all I got in life.... Its hard to keep holding on everyday...
My moms constantly in hospitals and rehab Facilities and it never ends.. Shes going downhill and there is no way out. I'm just preparing for the worst, but the slowness of it killing me along with her.... The slow, repeating, constant issues, and er visits she has..its reminiscent of my dad before he died...its getting so frequent.
Im so overwhelmed... I will try to get a new therapist appointment asap.. My sister/my mom Is blaming it all on me and not praying to god.. Because I don't believe in god. its my punishment and I reap what I sow according to them...so everything shitty in life I guess I deserve because I'm not a theist.
But I mean, look at my mom. She beleives. And look at the state of her. I'm always getting condescended to by my only family..
So... I'm trapped and alone. And feel like someone twisting a knife in my heart constantly..
And I get SOO angry when being preached to. Ppl telling me to beleive in God. BEEN there done that !
My moms constantly in hospitals and rehab Facilities and it never ends.. Shes going downhill and there is no way out. I'm just preparing for the worst, but the slowness of it killing me along with her.... The slow, repeating, constant issues, and er visits she has..its reminiscent of my dad before he died...its getting so frequent.
Im so overwhelmed... I will try to get a new therapist appointment asap.. My sister/my mom Is blaming it all on me and not praying to god.. Because I don't believe in god. its my punishment and I reap what I sow according to them...so everything shitty in life I guess I deserve because I'm not a theist.
But I mean, look at my mom. She beleives. And look at the state of her. I'm always getting condescended to by my only family..
So... I'm trapped and alone. And feel like someone twisting a knife in my heart constantly..
And I get SOO angry when being preached to. Ppl telling me to beleive in God. BEEN there done that !
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