It seems weird that I'm scared of typing this, I guess signing up here was the first step to accepting something is wrong. I'm not even sure what to say except hello. Part of me thinks that no names and no faces will make talking easier yet the thought of it still makes me feel a bit sick. I want to have hope that I will find myself again in a world of words and strangers yet there is always the fear I've been missing far too long. I just don't want to be lost any more, i don't want to be sad, but I'm afraid that if i lose the sadness there won't be anything left any more.