well i'm back, not feeling so good these days. i try and tell myself that this feeling suicidal is like a thunderstorm, that the rain is not going to last forever and that i won't always feel this way but it's hard. really hard. i feel so tired. tired of feeling crazy. tired of being bipolar. tired of the flashbacks, of dealing with the abuse i experienced growing up. i'm just so tired. i wish it all would end. thanks for listening c.